Where I Belong
by cravingMOREplz
Summary: My life began in the slums of Chicago. My way out was Aro Volturi, Drug Lord. I was his fearless protégé, and he taught me everything I knew, except about love. Edward Cullen, Chicago PD's newest recruit, took on that task. I wanted him, but it wasn't that easy. There's a price to pay, a sacrifice to make, and I'm it … dying in place of someone I love … right where I belong.
1. Prologue

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended. **

**Beta'd by SunflowerFran Thank you! **Mistakes are always my own****

**This is my first time posting a story so bear with me and I hope you enjoy it. **

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Summary:  
My name is Isabella Marie Dwyer. My life started in the slums of Chicago and ironically, my out came in the form of Aro Volturi, Drug Lord. I became his fearless protégé. He taught me everything I know; everything except love. Edward Cullen-Chicago PD's newest recruit—took on that task. And I wanted it, but getting out isn't easy. There's a price to pay, a sacrifice to make, and I'm it … dying in place of someone I love ... right where I belong.

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Prologue:

I've thought a lot about the way I'd die. Someone like me-born into this life-can't help but end up in a gutter somewhere. I hoped I'd escaped that fate but-ending up here-giving my life this way so he can have his. It's fitting. It has been the only selfless thing I've done since I've been back. I should have stayed away. I deserve this for the pain I've caused. I lay here broken and alone, too stubborn to close my eyes, struggling to breath. I don't know if I'll make it through the night or if this will be the last breath I take.

All of these thoughts, no matter how scary they seem, are only second to his face … Edward.

I want to tell him how sorry I am.

I want him to know I didn't mean it.

I need him to know how much I love him.

Regret fills me as I know I will never get to say the words to him and he'll never know how much he really means to me. I wish I had paper and a pen to scribble down an' I love you' but it seems pointless to even try. I doubt I could move an inch. I'm exhausted, and I think if I give in-let go of the fear, and just close my eyes, I could be with him again.

I could dream.

We could be together.

I could love him and let him love me, and I won't be lost any longer.

That's not a bad way to go.

Goodbyes are not forever.

Goodbyes are not the end.

They simply mean 'until we meet again'. I take comfort in those words. Words he uttered to me so long ago … in a different time and place.

In the beginning, when I still had a choice to make.

"Bella, you know goodbyes are not forever…" Edward tucks some loose hair behind my ear. He's done it so often over the past two years-it's comforting to have him do it again. "Goodbyes are not the end …" I'm not sure if leaving helps but I can't take the chance. Edward has been my best friend; my confidant, partner in crime, my savior. I never would have survived the last couple of years without him. He gave me a reason to live. "They simply mean until we meet again."

"I'll be back." I say through tears.

"Then why are you crying?" He gives me that crooked grin, palming my cheeks swiping away tears. "You don't have to go Bella. I don't want you to go." He half pleads. "I love you."

I want to say it back but the words have always been as elusive as the feeling … until Edward. I love him, and the words are on the tip of my tongue, but they never pass my lips.

"One year, I'll be back.

Wait for me?"

"Forever."

One year turned into two, two turned into ten.

The heartache and pain of what I've lost hurts more than the broken bones-cuts deeper than the gashes-and drains all my resolve, more than my weary muscles.

Warm tears pool and slide down across my face and onto the cold slab of concrete. "Be happy Edward … I'll always love you." I close my eyes and welcome the sudden warmth that overtakes me, as sparkling, green eyes and copper hair fill my thoughts in brilliant Technicolor.

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**A/N**

**Hope you enjoyed my first chapter. I'd love to know what you think.**

**It only takes a second to do something that means so much to every writer, but especially to new ones so ... Thanks for giving this a chance! **


	2. I Need To Come Home

**All the usual Disclaimers … I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**

**Beta'd by SunflowerFran … Thank You for your time, patience and support as I make my way into fandom!**Mistakes are my own****

**Welcome back! I hope you enjoy finding out a little more about Bella…**

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Chapter 1 - I Need To Come Home

June 2010

Persistent dreams are nothing new. I've woken up to variations of the same dream, off and on, for twelve years. Edward, holding me, telling me he loves me, a baby in my arms, and a cottage somewhere. After all these years I just expected them to fade or disappear completely, but no. They are as vivid as the first time I dreamt of Edward Cullen.

I'll never forget the call I got two months ago; the call that brought me back here. It was Charlie, my FBI handler and the only father who ever gave a damn. His cover; Chicago, Chief of Police.

"Marie it's over…"

That's all I heard.

After ten years, the nightmare was over.

Aro was dead.

What was supposed to have been a speedy trial and conviction ended up stealing a decade of my life when Aro escaped.

Charlie is talking and I know, it's important, I should be paying attention but I'm feeling nostalgic. He's not my bio dad, but he's been more of a father figure than any other man in my life, including my own parents.

Phil and Renee Dwyer brought me into the world, but drugs were always more important. I grew up with addicts, which means I grew up quickly. I took care of myself and more often than not, I took care of Phil and Renee too. Aro Volturi was their dealer. He was the neighborhood dealer-the go to guy when you needed a hit. Aro wasn't always the one handling the transactions; he had minions, and over the years, as business got better, he became more invisible. If it weren't for his daughter I would never have seen him.

Kate Volturi was a year older and took me under her wing. Some days she was the only reason I had something to eat. We bonded over the addicts in our lives-of course at the time, neither one of us knew what it meant to be an addict. We were two peas in a pod and she made that life bearable. Until one day she just disappeared. Aro never said what happened to her, and I was too afraid to ask.

I was seven when she disappeared and Aro took her place. He always had a presence in my life because of Kate, but now it seems he's taken more of an interest. First he fed me, bought me clothes, and then he trained me, groomed me to be … a killer.

My parents had drugs on tap and Aro had me.

As the years past, I sold, and became the unlikely enforcer when you didn't pay up. My gender and size always worked to my advantage. I was smart, really smart, no one ever suspected me, and anyone who was new, always underestimated me. You never saw me coming, and no one dared look at my face; my voice, unmistakable. If I was there, then they knew time was up; it was pay or die.

When business was done, I was gone in the wind. I knew these streets like the back of my hand and I could navigate them in the dark, blindfolded. I was the best Aro had.

No one knew what I did except Aro's innermost circle; he kept me close.

He doted on me like a daughter, but I knew better.

He would take me out in a heartbeat if I sneezed the wrong way. Not that I would. He had plans for me and I didn't care enough to question them. Aro knew I was not only street smart I was actually intelligent. School was a breeze. I never had to study, which left plenty of time for my illegal, extracurricular activities.

I must admit I was surprised when he got high one night and let me in on some of his long term goals. He had ideas of me becoming one of the 'boys in blue', and infiltrating the local PD. He's delusional; that was never going to happen. I gently told him how that wasn't one of his brighter ideas, and besides who would take my place here? It's a good thing he was high; he was happy and everything I said was hilarious. I suggested Law School to be funny. Unfortunately, he thought it was a good idea to have a lawyer in 'the family.' Just when I was celebrating my freedom from high school; I found myself enrolled, part time, Prelaw.

I was prepared for another, boring semester and another boring class, Criminal Justice. As it turned out, that class changed my life.

That was the first time I laid eyes on Edward or, I should say, he laid eyes on me. He was a senior and I was a freshman. The kicker was he was at the end of basic training at the Police Academy, yup, a cop. Needless to say I stayed away-didn't socialize with anyone, it was too dangerous.

But, he didn't take no for an answer though, persistent fucker. I was never suspicious of him, but I kept him from Aro anyway. I knew Edward had no clue who I was but having a cop this close to me-this close to Aro-I had to take every precaution, because I couldn't give him up.

I was addicted.

Edward became my drug of choice.

When I was with him I wasn't Isabella anymore. I was Bella, just Bella. That's what Edward did for me. That was the high I craved; the high I chased. He wore away my resolve with his crooked grin and green eyes. He gave me a taste of normal and I gave him my virginity. There were a few who had tried to take that away from me; they either ended up in the hospital or six feet under.

xxXXxx

"Marie! Can you hear me?"

"No, I'm sorry, what did you say?"

"I said a lot kiddo, but I'll just recap the highlights. Aro is dead. You can start over where ever you want. I'll set it up..."

"I want to come home." I say without a doubt; my thoughts going straight to Edward; excitement blossoming in my chest.

He clears his throat. "Well, ummm …"

His hesitation is unnerving. He never hesitates.

"Spit it out C."

He chuckles at my use of his nickname. "It's Edward kid."

We don't talk about Edward much, so for Charlie to bring him up and to also hesitate, takes me right off that cloud and has me on the edge.

"What about him?"

He blows out a deep breath. "He's getting married."

I furrow my brow and clench my jaw.

"I need to come home."

If you have a moment I would love to know what you think!

Next Chapter Teaser:

He stops abruptly but doesn't turn around.

"Bella?" His voice soft and laced with uncertainty.

"Yes," I confirm for him.

He finally turns around and I'm met with a familiar set of vibrant, green eyes.

The corners of his mouth lift slightly.

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**A/N**

**Thank you for reading and I'd love to hear what you think... :)**

******It only takes a second to do something that means so much to every writer but especially to new ones… Thank You!**


	3. Not Even A Goodbye

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**

**Beta'd by SunflowerFran… Thank You for your time, patience and support as I make my way into fandom! **Mistakes are my own****

**A Special Thank You to Deebelle Onefic for the Beautiful Banner! I LOVE IT!**

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Chapter 2 - Not Even A Goodbye...

The months before leaving Paris and finally being back to Chicago has made the dreams, both good and bad, come more often and Edward has occupied more waking hours than I'd like. I know he's close, and like every other addict, by body practically shakes from withdrawal. I need to see him; so here I am … like a stalker waiting for him at our diner. I know he will be in here to pick up lunch, just like he does every Friday. A little tidbit Charlie casually mentioned, because after he told me about the wedding plans, I haven't mentioned Edward's name again.

I'm sitting at what used to be our table when he strolls in. I gasp, momentarily struck dumb. The sight of him was a potent dose sent straight into my bloodstream. My veins pulse with electrifying, Edward induced, adrenaline, waking my body from its ten year slumber.

Edward has always been handsome. He always turned heads, but now he is devastatingly gorgeous. Seriously, the memories did him no justice. No one should be allowed to look that good. The years have been kind, but it's more than that. He looks ... happy. The thought of him moving on-being happy in a life without me, is a sobering one, and has me second guessing my intention. What did you expect Bella? I scolded myself. You're dead, and it's been ten years. He hasn't been pining away for you.

He's getting married for God sake!

Let him be happy.

I try to sway myself, but the second he walks out the door I panic. I'm selfish. I can't let him go, not this time. My legs move before I even know what's happening. I'm out the door and the words are out my mouth before I have time to think.

"Hey there stranger."

He stops abruptly but doesn't turn around.

"Bella?" His voice soft and laced with uncertainty.

"Yes," I confirm for him.

He finally turns around and I'm met with a familiar set of vibrant, green eyes. The corners of his mouth lift slightly.

"Bella," before I know it he lifts me up, into a tight hug and says, "you're alive."

I wrap my arms around him like I had a million times before and breathe him in. I melt into his embrace, recalling exactly how good and right it felt to be in his arms.

"It's Marie now," and because I have to know … hear it from him …I say, "I heard someone was getting married." I make sure not to choke on the words. I've always been good at hiding my emotions; occupational hazard, but with Edward it has always been difficult to do.

He sets me down to look at me. "I am," he says, his smile faded and the expression now solemn.

I must admit it does sting, but I knew this was a possibility.

"I'm sorry. Bella ... Charlie said you were dead."

"I know," I'm beyond sorry but I don't apologize. It had been four years with no end in sight; my future so uncertain. I wanted him to be happy. I gave the go ahead to fake my death, in hopes of luring Aro out, and finally bringing this to an end. It eventually worked, but not soon enough. Being here still isn't the smartest move, even if the threat was lifted.

But I need this.

"You knew?" He's accusing more than asking.

My lack of response tells him everything.

"So, Tanya?"

I change the subject, desperate to take the focus off of me. Tanya was an incoming transfer after I left, and was assigned to be his partner. Over the years Charlie mentioned her, but as far as I knew there was never anything between them.

He nods absentmindedly.

"When?"

"Five weeks."

Five weeks and Tanya will be Mrs. Edward Cullen.

That should be my title.

It could have been.

Maybe it still can?

"Are you here visiting Charlie? I know he's missed you."

"I actually moved back."

"What! You moved back here, to Chicago, for good?"

I nod.

"Why? Why now?"

I want to tell him the truth … that I came back for him, but he's not ready to hear that just yet, so I tell him the next best thing.

"The threat has been lifted and all the people I love most are still here." I never say the 'L' word. It's like the plague to me and he knows it. So I hope he catches my drift without me explaining it.

He looks … surprised, and then confused, and then quickly settles to sad resignation. Not the reaction I was hoping for.

"Well, it's good to have you back Bel ... Marie. Listen I wish I could stay but I have to get going."

"Edward wait," he turns to face me. "Could we maybe have dinner tomorrow or lunch?"

"I'll call you."

Then he's gone.

That's all I get after ten years.

Not even a goodbye.

The only man I have ever loved, will ever love, just ran away from me like someone had a gun to his head.

He doesn't call. I stayed home all day waiting. The phone never rings. He doesn't have my new cell so I figure he would know I'm at Charlie's and would call the landline.

He doesn't call all week.

I know he's probably upset with me, but I was hoping he would at least call. If nothing else to say he couldn't make it.

Silence is way worse.

I've had ten years of it.

The wedding is one month away and I'm running out of time. So I hop into Charlie's truck and drive-unsure of where I'm heading, until I find myself pulling into his parents' place.

I drive up and see cars out front, but Edward's car isn't one of them. I contemplate leaving but he could still be here, so I force myself out of the beast and headed for the door. It opens before I make it up the steps.

"Well, now, this makes a lot of sense." Alice says rushing out and pulling me into a bone, crushing hug. "It's about time you came home." She whispers, and an instant later she wrenches me away to look at me, then pulls me in again tight and with so much enthusiasm says, "This place hasn't been the same without you. I've missed the ever loving hell out of you Bella."

'Not the same' should be a good thing. The drama that surrounded me back then was enough to last several lifetimes. It surely isn't something anyone would miss, but Alice was like a sister. Yet another relationship I abandoned. I don't deserve this welcome, but we've already established how selfish I am, so I take it like a lifeline … to the life I so desperately want.

Back.

"I'm sorry Alice."

"I know B." No one has called me that in ages.

"It's Marie now."

She finally lets go, acknowledging my new name and pulls me inside. One look around and I'm eighteen again. There have been changes, but the overall space is the same; warm, inviting and safe-just like I remember it. Looking around some more I see the telltale signs of wedding preparations.

"Edward isn't here." She says knowingly.

I hold in my disappointment, but Alice was always good at reading me.

"Don't worry B. He'll be back. Besides, I want to have you to myself for a little while."

She sees me taking in all the decorations.

"You know I always thought this wedding would be you and Edward."

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**A/N:**

**I'd love to hear your thoughts...**

**I think I might be getting the hang of this posting thing, lol! The first two postings felt kind of like fumbling around in the dark until I bumped into what I was looking for… I'm nowhere near comfortable navigating around here but it's getting better.**

**So B and E are reunited, well, at least in the same city… that's a start!**

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**I love when authors do recs at the end of chapters so I thought I would throw a few out there. Here are some amazing throwback (for me) recs, ones I read when I first started reading fanfics. If you haven't read them yet you seriously have to put them on the TBR list!**

_Femme Docs and Kevlar Knights by: A Cullen Wannabe_  
_Bella is a first yr medical intern who was raised by her brother Emmett and his friends after their parents died when she was 16. When a night in the ER turns dangerous can her boys, now members of the best SWAT team in Chicago save her?_

_Wild by: PeppahLouie_  
_Recently widowed Bella moves to Seattle to start a new life. Reconnecting with her friend, Bella meets Alice's brother, Chef Edward Cullen. Celibate by choice for 2 years, what happens when Edward finds himself undeniably attracted to a sexy new Bella?_

_******It only takes a second to do something that means so much to every writer but especially to new ones… Thank You!**_


	4. Big Trouble

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**

**Beta'd by SunflowerFran … Thank You for your time, patience and support as I make my way into fandom! **Mistakes are my own****

**A Special Thank You to Deebelle Onefic for the Beautiful Banner! I LOVE IT!**

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Chapter 3 - Big Trouble

September 1998 - Twelve Years Earlier...

It's the end of the second week of classes. I sit towards the back, out of the way, in my usual seat. And as expected the little pixie and her godlike boyfriend have moved closer to me. I don't miss much; call it paranoia, a sixth sense-Aro's voice constantly in my head. The first day they were in the front row and every day after that they have progressively moved closer to me. Now they are only a few rows away. I might have thought the worse except that in my periphery I can see him stealing glances at me, and on occasion, I make eye contact, my expression blank, but he smiles. He's flirting. If his girl doesn't notice him blatantly eye-fucking me I might have to teach him a lesson myself. It would be a shame to mess up that pretty face of his. Class ends and it never takes me long to gather my belongings and book it out of there.

"Hey wait up!"

I heard him call to me but I keep walking.

"Bella!"

The sound of my name slows my stride and I pause long enough for him to catch up.

"Didn't you hear me? Are you in a hurry to be somewhere?"

"Class," Was all I say waiting for him to say what he needs to so I could be on my way.

"Oh okay, I won't keep you. I'm Edward …" I know this already. Class participation-the 15% of our grade that I will be missing, has made that possible. "... I don't normally do this, but do you have plans this weekend?"

Only the usual. Collecting a debt, possibly taking a life, the same as last weekend.

"Yes."

A one word answer is all I offer him before shifting my gaze to Alice, who's watching us intently. His face falls ever so slightly, a micro expression that most would miss, and he covers it quickly. He's genuinely disappointed with my answer or it could be my callousness, either way, it stirs something unsettling in me. He follows my gaze but doesn't comment. It's not like this is the first time someone has approached me this way and my reaction has always been just as cold. It never bothered me before.

"My sister, Alice…" He gestures to her and she waves; I don't. His sister? She looks nothing like him, polar opposites … not his girlfriend. Why does the news excite me? "... is throwing a party and I was wondering if you would like to come? It will be going all night so you could come whenever."

He's waiting, expecting me to say something.

"I'll think about it." I say curtly, brushing him off as I begin to walk away. Not sure what there is to think about. I won't be going, but saying that felt oddly, good.

"Wait!" He calls after me. I roll my eyes before turning around.

"I probably won't see you before the party so here is the address and my phone number. It's Saturday, don't forget you can come whenever."

I take the folded piece of paper, shove it in my pocket and take off before he says anything else.

"See you Saturday Bella." He hollers at me. I could hear the hope in his voice.

I hate the attention he's drawing to me so I duck my head and ignore him.

xxXXxx

Saturday, Aro sent me to collect from our good friend Marcus. When he says 'good friend' he means one of my regulars. The ones that only pay up when they know I'm collecting. It took longer than I anticipated because I couldn't find the coke-snorting sleazebag. He wasn't at any of the typical Saturday night hotspots. It's not uncommon to have to hunt down the deadbeats but it really pisses me off. I especially hate having to don heels and a dress; it cramps my style, slows me down, and not to mention, always ruins the dress.

Marcus was clearly hiding from me and he's lucky I didn't have to get all dressed up for him because that would have really pissed me the fuck off. When I finally found him, in his mother's basement of all places, I surprised him with one swift kick to the balls before collecting all of Aro's money, plus a little something extra for the trouble, luckily he had it all on him.

I'm sick of his bullshit so I lean in close to be sure he hears me. He's curled up on the floor; his eyes shut tight, writhing in agony.

"The next time you hide from me will be your last, and I'll be sure Jr. knows he'll be taking over your sales." He whimpers.

His kid is in school. Some expensive Ivy League bullshit, and Marcus wants it to stay that way … just another reason why he's always scrambling to pay up. Tuition, expensive pad, fancy cars, top of the line everything … Jr. Is living large, just like dear old dad but without the drug habit. If Marcus wasn't sorting as much of the merchandise as he was selling, he wouldn't be in this pickle constantly.

"Am I making myself clear?"

He nods furiously.

"I need to hear it Marcus."

"Yes, clear, won't happen again." He chokes out.

xxXXxx

I've pulled out the paper Edward handed to me two days ago. It's tattered and starting to fall apart because of all the folding and refolding I've done over the past two days. I intended to throw it out, but always end up opening it to look at the elegant script. Then, unable to part with it, I stuff it back in my pocket. His handwriting matches him, if that's possible.

My attachment to this scrap of paper has me checking the time.

Midnight.

"He said whenever," I think out loud. Regardless of how many times I decided I wasn't going to the party, I ended up there anyway.

I pull up at almost one in the morning and kill the engine. The party is still going strong, with several guests spilling out onto the lawn. It's a modest home in a decent neighborhood. Nothing flashy and I'm momentarily relieved, because I wasn't dressed in anything special.

I'm sitting in my car for a few minutes thinking how stupid this is.

I don't belong here.

What's the point?

I'm about the start the car again and leave when I see Alice head over and tap on my window.

"Are you going to sit out here all night?" She says with a wide smile.

I roll the window down to talk to her instead of getting out. "No, just leaving."

"Bella, you just got here. Come in and say hi to Edward. He'll be glad you came. At least have a drink before you go."

I groan internally as she drags me in to find Edward. We shove through the tight crowd and into the living room. I stop in my tracks as I read the overhead banner.

This is not just any party; this is a party for Edward. Alice tugs my arm when she feels me resists. I tug back looking at the banner then her.

"This is a party for Edward?"

"Ya, he just graduated from the Police Academy." She's beaming-obviously proud of her brother.

Edwards' a cop … a fucking cop! Christ, do I know how to pick 'em.

"Why is he in CJ then?"

"He's auditing. I'm taking it; but it's only a refresher for him."

Crap, I have to get out of here.

I pull out my phone, pretending I got an important text.

"Alice something has come up. I have to go." I start backing out slowly. This room must be crawling with his police academy buddies, and who knows who else might be here. I don't need to stick around and find out though. "I'll see you guys on Monday."

I make it to my car, get in, and begin to pull out of the driveway as quickly as I can. But I see Edward running after me.

"BELLA!"

I should keep driving and pretend I didn't hear him but there is something about my name coming out of his mouth that's too appealing. I stop and let him catch up. The lighting isn't that great but even in the dark he's something to look at.

I roll down the window as he approaches, not at all out of breath.

"Hey, where you running off to?"

"Something came up."

"At this time?"

I shrug.

"I'll go with you."

"What?"

I appraise him carefully. He's serious.

"You can't just leave your own party."

"Why not? No one will even miss me; most of them are drunk anyway."

"Maybe another time."

"When?"

"Another time."

"Tomorrow?"

"I'll get back to you."

"When?"

"I don't know. I have to go." I say exasperatedly. He walks and slowly starts jogging, keeping pace with the car.

I look over at how ridicules he looks following me and can't help but crack the tiniest smile. His returning smile is so bright you'd think he won the lottery.

"Monday," I relent.

"Monday it is." His smile gets impossibly wider.

I hit the gas; my tires screeching as they spin out and I take off. Not the best thing to do in front of a cop, but if I stay any longer he might get me to agree to something else.

That smile is, "Trouble," I mutter.

"I'm in big trouble."

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**A/N:**

**Thank you for reading my initiation into fandom as a writer! I appreciate the kind words and follows and I hope you continue to enjoy my little fic.**

_In Other News:_

_One of our own has published her first book. Steph aka solostintwilight on FF, Lostluggage on Twilighted and Holdme Ransom on FB has pulled Amishward - In Your World and has published it as Healing Faith by: Jennyfer Browne. It is available on Amazon right now. Steph is an amazing writer as you may already know so if you can… show her some love and support and don't forget to review!_

**If you have a sec, I'd love to hear your thoughts...**

_******It only takes a second to do something that means so much to every writer but especially to new ones… Thank You!**_


	5. Deal

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**

**Beta'd by SunflowerFran … Thank You for your time, patience and support as I make my way into fandom! **Mistakes are my own****

**A Special Thank You to Deebelle Onefic for the Beautiful Banner! I LOVE IT!**

* * *

Chapter 5: Deal

When I walk into class Monday morning, low and behold, Edward and Alice are sitting in the back row right next to my seat … predictable. Looks like they brought me coffee, too, Starbucks, no less.

I eye them, momentarily considering switching rows. That smile from Saturday night permeated my dreams, and seeing it now in broad daylight is more than I can handle this early in the morning. I sit down, leaving a seat open between Edward and myself and busy my hands with getting my tape recorder (a recent necessity given the unwelcome distraction), notebook, and pen ready. Alice slides into the seat beside me and opens up her fancy MacBook. Edward leans over Alice to set the coffee on my desk. I drink my coffee black-I've acquired the taste since cream and sugar were a luxury I didn't have when I start drinking it. How anyone spends $5 for a cup of sugar disguised as a cup of coffee, is beyond me. I don't touch it on principal.

After class I don't rush out like I normally would. I gather my things slowly and wait for Edward to follow me out. I don't need this particular kind of trouble following me around.

"Thanks for not bolting this time … you're hard to catch." He's talking to my back.

I put on a stern mask and turn to face him.

I look him straight in the eye so my message is clear…

Wow … the most extraordinary pair of piercing, green eyes are staring back at me. I knew his eyes were unusual, but I never looked this closely before ... as if I needed another reason to want to look at him.

"Do you drink coffee?"

A simple question and I'm turning into some … I don't know … hormonal teenager and I don't like it. He throws me off balance. I do a mental head shake before responding.

"Edward …"

"Nope, stop with the Edward. Sentences that start with my name are followed with bad news. No coffee for you then ..."

"It's not that ..."

"Boyfriend?"

"No."

"Controlling parents?"

"No." Not controlling with me anyway, drugs is another matter completely.

"Okay, so ... you must have decided where you're taking me later?"

"Huh?"

What the hell is he talking about?

"You said you were going to take me somewhere on Monday."

"I said I would think about it."

Tricky.

"Bella, I have the distinct feeling you're trying to get rid of me …"

How observant ...

"... and I have to tell you it won't be easy. There's something about you that intrigues me. That doesn't happen, ever. I won't ask you out if that makes you uncomfortable, but can we be friends at least? Study partners maybe, I aced this class already and I hold mounds of useless information." He says tapping his head.

I suppress the irritating urge to giggle.

"I have no room in my life for someone like you Edward." It's the most honest way I can explain it to him.

He feigns hurt, "I'm crushed Bella. You don't even know me."

I know enough.

"Just give me a month. If at the end of the month you don't think I'm worthy of a friendship I'll leave you alone. I won't even glance in your direction."

I think about that-It would be easier if he would willingly just ignore me-but a month is too long.

"A week," I bargain.

"Oh come on, I'd have to move in with you if you want to get to know me in a week … on second …"

"Two weeks …" I offer, not liking where he was going.

"Three and that's my final offer."

"Fine, three weeks but I say where and when." I can't have him interfering with business.

"We can negotiate those terms tonight over dinner."

Butterflies, I have stupid, fucking butterflies in my stomach … great!

"Fine."

BIG fucking trouble.

* * *

**A/N**

**Thank You for following, reading, and reviewing! **

**It makes my day and makes me smile to know people are reading so if you have a sec drop a quick review … please and thank you. :)**

**A HUGE Thanks to LayAtHomeMom who rec'd this little story in her fic Hooked Up and Locked Down (which is amazing btw! Check it out if you haven't already.)**


	6. Why Can't You Say It

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**

**Beta'd by SUNFLOWER3759… Thank You for your time, patience and support as I make my way into fandom! **Mistakes are my own****

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Chapter 6 - Why Can't You Say It?

March 1999

BPOV

Three weeks came and went.

Neither of us noticed as each month morphed into the next. Edward has so effortlessly fit into a part of my life I carved out just for him. Leading a double life for the past six months has been challenging, but the rewards far outweigh the trouble. No one has been the wiser. Edward hasn't pushed too hard and Aro and his minions don't seem to give a fuck about what I do, as long as I'm there when he needs me, the merchandise is plentiful, and the money flows consistently; lining his pockets each week.

That doesn't mean I'm not careful-the opposite really. I'm extra careful now. If Aro found out I was sleeping with a cop, Edward and I would both be at the bottom of Lake Michigan, and that's if he's feeling particular generous, or he's extremely high.

Edward and I are tangled up in the sheets of his bed like we normally are at one of our study session. It's a good thing I don't need much review, because studying is really code for getting naked as soon as possible and having Edward send me to a different state of consciousness as many times as possible.

I'm in such a state right now-or the tail end of it anyway-when Edward's warm breath tickles my ear.

"I love you, Bella."

I don't tense at the words anymore; I like it now, but I don't repeat the sentiment either. I think he's grown accustomed to my silence on the matter. I just snuggle in closer and feel his arms tighten around me from behind. I just want to enjoy the moment and not talk about feelings. It's a waste of time and I can't stay all night. I have to get back to my place soon, in order to keep this studying charade plausible.

"Why can't you say it?"

That makes me tense-managing to chase away any lingering, post orgasmic clouds I might have been riding.

"You don't want me to …"

"Bullshit, you know I do."

"Trust me, if ..." ... you knew who I really was ... I trail off in my head.

"You can tell me ... I won't judge you Bella …" Maybe not, but I can't risk it, "... I know you've had it rough. Your parents being addicts, how you grew up ... that was hard on you …"

Hard doesn't begin to describe the life I lead … the life I am leading right now. I gave him parts of my past. The stories that didn't involve my connection to Aro. It was the first time I'd ever spoken about my past with anyone, and surprisingly, it wasn't difficult to tell him. It came out easily, like I was talking about someone else; Isabella, not Bella. I never shed a tear before about the shady people I call my parents and I don't intend to start now.

They don't deserve my tears.

"... There's nothing you could say that would change the way I feel about you."

I want to believe him, but who would knowingly love a killer?

That's what I am; a cold blooded killer.

I don't think the fact that every life I took deserved it makes any difference. Somehow I doubt he would see it that way but It's how I've been rationalizing it, lately, anyway. Since Edward, I seem to have developed a conscience. It doesn't stop me from doing it-I still have a job to do-but I reflect on it now. My reflections mostly revolve around how this is just another thing, another death, I have to keep from Edward. Nothing profound about the value in human life, or something equally worthless.

Evil people who kill and torture deserve a worse fate than I have ever delivered. Cruelty has never been my forte, but that doesn't mean I didn't want to torture a few of the bastards I've ended. A crime against children is a sore spot for me, and while I don't cut off fingers or toes, I don't deny a mind game or two before claiming their lives. Sometimes the mind delivers a pain more crushing and torturous and infinitely more satisfying then fingers and toes. Some have called me sadistic and I suppose sometimes it's true. There are times I've enjoyed taking a life, but if I was given the option, I would retire Isabella in a heartbeat, for a life just being Bella … Edward's Bella.

"I will, one day. Just not today."

I turn in his arms to pull him close and kiss away the truth and all the lies. He wraps his arms around me, thankfully accepting my lame attempt of avoidance. I could kill a man twice my size without any trouble, but being in Edward's arms makes me feel safe and protected, even loved. It heals and soothes me … feelings I've read about in books but couldn't appreciate as anything more than words on a page, until now.

I know his presence in my life is temporary; at some point I either have to come clean or let him go, or possibly both. But that time isn't now. I want to be the Bella he believes I am for as long as I can get away with it. I don't know how long that's going to be, and I'm too selfish and weak not to hold on to whatever I can have right now.

"I love you Bella ... Always." He tells me again as he positions himself and slides in, claiming my body like only he can.

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**A/N**

**Thank You for following, reading and reviewing! **

**Another short chapter ... I hope you enjoyed it. The next few will be longer.**

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	7. Special Agent Swan

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**

**Beta'd by SUNFLOWER3759… Thank You for your time, patience and support as I make my way into fandom! **Mistakes are my own****

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**A warm welcome to all the new followers. Thank you for checking this out and I hope you are enjoying. **

**Are you ready for an Edward POV?**

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Chapter 7 - Special Agent Swan

October 1999

EPOV

Bella and I have been dating for almost a year. She has her secrets, but I'm pretty sure I've figured them out. She's involved with some dangerous people and for obvious reasons doesn't want me to know. I've followed her-seen her in action-and while the sight of her in that element makes me cringe, it also relieves me to know she can take care of herself. She's quick and fucking deadly. I can't always hear what's being said, but I can see enough to know what's going down. Watching her handle a gun like an expert is disturbing enough without realizing how much the sight of it turns me on.

Keeping in the shadows just watching was difficult the first time and I've given up trying to follow her once she leaves. I can't figure out how she gets away so quickly with me on her tail. I don't know exactly how she got mixed up in it, possibly through her parents' addiction, and I don't know how deeply she is involved. I know If I call her on it I might have to Miranda her, and that's not a situation I want to put myself in, now or ever. So I turn a blind eye until I can figure out another way.

I have to figure a way out.

I can't imagine my life without her.

She still can't tell me she loves me and I'm hoping it's just this mess she's in that's keeping her from giving me that part of her. She's so emotionally unpredictable. She doesn't deal with emotions in the typical way. I don't want to scare her, but I have a ring that's burning a hole in my pocket. She's not ready for me to ask her and I'm certifiable for thinking it'll be okay while she lives this double life. The fact is I don't know if she will ever be ready. But I want to be prepared; hoping that there will be a moment when the stars align, and it feels right.

The first set of stars aligned when Charlie Swan became Chief of Police.

He had been on the job less than a week when he approached me about Bella, Isabella. He started asking innocent questions at first, then worked his way to more probing ones that had me sweating bullets. The questions suggested that he had an intimate knowledge of her life. I was worried that he might think I was aware of Bella's nighttime work, and if that was the case, I might as well turn in my badge because there was no way in hell that I was going to rat her out. Turns out he didn't ask for my badge, but instead gave me what Bella couldn't or wouldn't give me. The missing pieces of her life-her connection to Aro Volturi, head of the growing Volturi crime family.

Chief Swan is actually Special Agent Charles Swan, undercover with the FBI. He has been working for years putting a case together against Aro and his associates. Up to this point, he hasn't come close to getting what he needs. All he has is circumstantial evidence, at best; nothing solid enough to stick. He needs someone on the inside, someone close enough to Aro, someone who Aro Volturi trusts.

He needs Isabella, and he wants me to convince her to work for him on the inside.

I was flooded with gratitude for this turn of events and eager to hear the details. He outlined the plan and I was completely onboard until he got to the part where Bella has to enter the Witness Protection Program. I was blind sighted. All I could see was getting Bella a way out of the situation she was in; I hadn't even considered that she would have to leave me.

October 1999

BPOV

I'll never forget the first time I met Special Agent Swan, or Charlie, C. Edward had just confessed to following me and told me what he knew. As soon as those three letters, FBI past his lips I was livid and started throwing punches. We went a few solid rounds … I knew I was being irrational, rougher than he deserved and he still refused to hit me. He did a good job of dodging and pinning me, but I always managed to escape and land a few hits. I didn't want to kill him of course, even though I figured we were probably as good as dead either way. Despite that grim thought, it felt good to move this way with him. He pinned me down, wedging himself between my legs in a compromising position-one we've been in numerous times before, just not while fighting.

His lips crash into mine, his tongue attacking my mouth, and of course I responded. The kiss was blazing with a need that bordered on insanity. Still gripping my wrists tightly, he slowly pulled back from me.

"Stop Bella," our breaths were labored; chests heaving.

"How could you …" I panted. I knew this was his job, but I couldn't help but feel the sting of betrayal.

"You didn't let me finish … He wants to help you." He panted back. Ya right, since when does FBI care to help someone like me. I already knew where this was going.

"I'd never … I love you … I'd turn myself in before I said one word against you."

"Am I interrupting something?" A rough voice I would eventually grow to admire interrupted our standoff.

"I'm going to let you up … don't hit me." I didn't make any promises, but he let me up anyway.

Charlie and Edward both reached out to offer me a hand. I ignored them both, pulling my legs in and jumping up easily.

"I'm Special Agent Cha …" he says as he tries to introduce himself.

"Let's skip past the pleasantries C. What do you want?"

"C, I like it." A slight smile playing on his lips, "Can I call you B?"

"You can call me whatever you want. Now let's hear it." I'm growing impatient.

They give me the details of my suicide mission … because that's exactly what this is … suicide.

A snitch has never breached Aro's inner circle, and those that tried had been caught and tortured-sometimes beyond recognition. Those bodies don't disappear. They are displayed as a warning … a 'fuck you' to whoever sent them.

There's no option here.

The FBI doesn't knock on your door politely asking you to roll over. No, they tell you what they want and you do it or you're dead … really no different than what Aro does, just legal. I might last one day behind bars if Aro doesn't get to me beforehand. It's that simple.

The real decision is not whether I'll do it; it's who I'm doing it for … Edward. The hope and love in his beautiful, green eyes has always moved me to do stupid things; this is no different...

"I have one condition."

"What's that?" C, who is now all business, inquires curiously.

"Edward has nothing to do with it."

"Wait a minute!" Edward quickly and loudly protests.

I look at C; determination clearly written across my face, "I mean it; he's nowhere near anything having to do with this."

He nods a silent agreement.

"Chief you can't take me off this…" Edward begins to reason, but is abruptly cut off.

"B's right, you're too close to the case to be helpful."

With that decision made, Edward huffs and pounds the table with his clenched hand before angrily fisting his hair.

I know he wants to protect me. I feel the same way, which is why I don't want him anywhere near this. I worked too hard keeping him out of Aro's line of sight for him to be thrown in by the FBI when the shit hits the fan.

No way.

* * *

**A/N**

**Thank You for following, reading and reviewing! **

**So this was a longer… hope you enjoyed hearing from E a little. **

**What did you think?**

**It makes my day and makes me smile to know people are reading so if you have a sec drop a quick review … please and thank you. :)**


	8. Saying Goodbye

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**  
**Beta'd by SUNFLOWER3759 Thank you! **Mistakes are my own****

**Hope you all liked hearing from Edward last chapter… There will be more of him. **  
**This isn't a long fic and we are halfway through now… I don't hear from too many of you so I can only hope you are all still reading and enjoying this.**

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Chapter 8

November 2000

BPOV

Over the next year, I worked closely with Charlie on the case against Aro, and we began developing a sort of kinship. It took that long to compile enough evidence to put Aro and his cronies behind bars and throw away the key. I refused to wear a bullet-proof vest or a wire all the time. It's just not practical. I was trusted, but even I didn't escape the occasional pat down or body search. Aro is nothing if not predictable in that department. I knew when I could get away with a wire, a camera, or whatever MacGyver or 007 shit they came up with and when I could not. Those instincts, as well as my firsthand knowledge, is why they came to me in the first place … they just had to trust me now.

Trust didn't come easy though, especially for me; and Edward wasn't helping. He was furious that I shut him out of this. He didn't like not being in the loop when things went down, and he had to agree to stop following me. That news did not go over well, and I'm glad it was C that delivered it. Edward and his family will be safe when I leave … if I make it out alive.

That's all that mattered to me now.

Today is the day we have been waiting for. After today, I'll have to go into hiding. Today is the icing on the proverbial cake.

Aro and his brother Caius were picking up a large shipment of drugs. They normally don't take part in this end of the transaction and never together, but this shipment is the largest they've ever taken in and they didn't trust anyone else to take care of it.

With the Feds having a stronger presence lately, the shipments have been fewer and farther between, making the product level extreme low. I also don't ever show up at one of these pickups, but Aro wanted me around as a bodyguard. There are a few of us, but Aro feels safer with me watching his back as I've done countless times before … only this time it's different; this time I'll be the one sticking the proverbial knife into his back. I wasn't entirely sure how I felt about that, but I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that Aro Volturi had to be taken out. However, the slight twinge of guilt working its way through my body was not an emotion I was fond of.

We didn't have to wait long.

Once money and merchandise had exchanged hands the Feds moved in, and the place was instantly surrounded; guns popping off rounds on both sides as Aro attempted the planned escape route. The route was clever and secret, and only Aro and I knew about it.

Once we made it past the entrance C was there, gun poised … expectant.

Aro, stunned, slowly turned to face the barrel of my gun … realization of my betrayal reaching his eyes … the sinister smile creeping up onto his face was almost enough to make me shudder, but I remained in control and stared blankly into his deadly glare.

"Well played, Isabella…" He says calmly and without fear, as C cuffs him and reads him his rights.

"... You know I'll come for you."

I knew ... This wasn't over.

I slipped away undetected as was the plan, but instead of the safe house, I detoured, knowing C would understand where I went.

I couldn't leave without first seeing Edward. I couldn't do that to him or to me. I knew he feared this part the most, and I promised I wouldn't leave without a goodbye.

I silently came in through the back door, making sure I wasn't followed. Edward took one look at me and knew. His glassy eyes matched mine.

November 2000

EPOV

I heard the soft click of the door. I knew that had to be Bella, so I quickly turned the corner. Even in the dim lighting I could see the emotion on her face, the sudden tears that were hidden behind her eyes gripped my chest … this was goodbye.

I knew this day would come, but I was utterly unprepared for it to be today, right now. She flung herself into my arms wrapping her legs around my waist. I caught her, buried my face into her neck and held her tight, "No, not yet..."

She didn't say anything, didn't confirm or deny anything, just kissed me hard and desperate. We clung to each other, and the moment swept us into a whirlwind of need. We made quick work of our clothes and barely reached the bed before she sunk down on me. I watched as she took what she needed from me and I felt her tell me with her body what she couldn't tell me with words. Our bodies spoke a language all their own, pushing and pulling, giving and taking pleasure until the euphoric climax consumed us and eventually faded away. We stayed connected, holding on to the feeling for as long as possible.

"I have to leave soon." She kisses my chest, and I pull her tighter to me like somehow that would fuse our bodies and she couldn't leave.

"Charlie will have my ass and yours if I'm any later." She says smiling, trying to lighten the moment that is slowly shredding me piece by piece.

The Chief can kiss my ass.

I'm not letting her go until I'm good and ready. There are still so many things we have to say to each other. I know in my heart she loves me. She shows me every day and with her expressions it's as plain as the nose on her face.

But she still hasn't said it.

She can't get past whatever it is that holds her back. The lack of loving relationships growing up has hidden that part of her for too long. When you grow up with addicts who practically sell you to their dealer, love doesn't come easy. I know, and I understand this. It shouldn't be a big deal to me, but there is something to be said for verbal affirmation. I've never wanted to hear the words from anyone more than I did right now … from her. She'll be leaving, and I want to hear her tell me just once, just once that she loves me. I love her beyond reason. It's a crazy, stupid, jump off a cliff kind of love that I feel in every cell down to my very core. She has me so completely that she can't possibly comprehend the depth of it. Well, I'm sure she has an inkling since I tell her every chance I get.

She could stay.

They could bring Aro down without her leaving, but she's stubborn, insisting that it's the only way. Deep down-in a place I refuse to go, I know she's right. I just can't stand the thought of her leaving. The ring I have carried in my pocket has scorched my leg … the perfect moment never revealing itself.

Her grip goes slack as she moves to get out of my bed.

"I could go with you." I say feeling the time dwindle. Her fluid movements still, before she responds the way I know she will.

"You know why that's not possible. Aro doesn't know your connection to me, other than a classmate. It has to stay that way. You can't disappear or change your routine…"

I know all this already.

It's irrational I know.

It's the crazy, stupid love talking again, trying to figure a way in the eleventh hour.

"... When I'm gone, you go on like nothing has changed and he'll have no reason to believe otherwise. You'd put your whole family at risk by leaving. Think of Alice, Esme and Carlisle; all of you can't just up and leave."

Her words come out rushed and ever so slightly panicked. I begin to feel guilty for making this harder on her. She's getting emotional; that never happens. She never cries and yet the tears are slowly streaming down her face. It's the closest thing to hearing an I love you as I'm going to get. And for now ... it's enough.

I put on a brave front even though I'm slowly dying inside. I go to her, getting close enough to cherish the evidence of her love rounding her cheeks and spilling onto my hands.

It's time to say goodbye.

"Bella, you know goodbyes are not forever …"

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**A/N**

**So what did you think? **

**This was the start of the flash back that Bella has having of 'goodbyes are not forever' in the Prologue but in an EPOV.**  
**Next chapter we will be getting closer to the present.**  
**Last chapter tipped WIB over 100 Reviews! I am ecstatic and looking forward to the next 100! **  
**Thank you all again for following, reading, and reviewing! It only takes a second to do something that means so much to every writer, but especially to new ones so ... Thank you!**


	9. The War Raging In My Head

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**

**Beta'd by SUNFLOWER3759 Thank you! **Mistakes are my own****

**Alright guys this is a short chapter, I'm sorry, but we are closer to the present. This is a little taste of what E is going though after finding out B is still alive. The next one is longer and Edward and Bella will be face to face again. **

**Enjoy!**

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Chapter 9

June 2010

EPOV

"Edward, what's wrong?"

"It's nothing."

"It's something ... You haven't touched me in weeks. You said you weren't feeling well, but you seem fine now."

These feeling will go away ... I tell myself for the hundredth time.

I can not hurt Tanya like this.

I've moved on.

Bella is my past; Tanya is my future.

"I'm sorry Tanya. I know I've been distant. I've just got a lot on my mind."

"Is it the wedding? You aren't getting cold feet are you?"

"No, it's not that." I lie through my teeth. "Come here."

I pull her to me and kiss her. We haven't been intimate or even kissed much since Bella reappeared. Every time I close my eyes, instead of blonde hair and blue eyes, I see mahogany brown hair and chocolate brown eyes staring at me. It feels as though I'm using Tanya to fulfill fantasies about Bella, and the guilt is consuming me. Tanya is in my arms; she's doing all the right things, but my body just won't respond. I'm an asshole for doing it, but it's the only way she's going to get the reaction she is expecting. I flood my mind with thoughts of Bella; memories I'd locked away and only now allowed myself to remember. Bella flushed and writhing beneath me her moans, my name falling from her lips as she came.

"Oh Edward, I love you." Bella's lips are moving, and apart from the fact she never said those words to me, the voice is all wrong.

It's Tanya.

We've stripped down, and I'm on top of her. She is panting and pulling me closer-expecting me to make love to her. I want to so badly, but when I open my eyes, Bella disappears and so does my erection.

"Fuck! I'm sorry Tanya…" I tell her before I roll off of her. I sit up, plant my feet on the floor, and bury my head in my hands. I can't look at her. I'm embarrassed and ashamed. I can't bear to see how I've hurt her this time.

There is a war raging in me.

Bella-my Bella-is alive.

I'm both ecstatic and distraught all at the same time. I spent years working to move past the massive hole she left in my heart. Tanya was there almost every step of the way, and after Bella's death-against my better judgment-I got involved with her, and told her all about Bella. She needed to know why I was the way I was-damaged. Over the years, she has come to know the story very well and has been supportive and patient with me. But, now her patience has run out. She wanted a commitment, and she deserved a commitment. I didn't want to lose her, so I proposed.

My history with Bella, and by association, Aro Volturi, doesn't scare Tanya; though it should have. Anyone else would have avoided me, but she loves me anyway. That takes guts, and this is how I treat her. I am fucking trying my best for Tanya's sake. I haven't mentioned to her that Bella is back; in fact, I try to keep away from anything Bella related, but my mind and body are fucking traitors. They won't let her go, and Tanya knows I'm hiding something.

"It's okay," she coos in my ear as she kisses my shoulder and slides off the bed, positioning herself between my legs.

"Please don't Tanya." I tell her as she takes my flaccid cock in her mouth. I don't want her to bring me pleasure when I'm causing her so much pain.

"It's okay Edward, I just want to make you feel good … just relax … please." I don't fucking deserve her, and I hate myself for agreeing because I have to close my eyes and bring Bella back into our bedroom.

* * *

**A/N**

**Thank you all again for following, reading, and reviewing! It only takes a second to do something that means so much to every writer but especially to new ones. **  
**Thank you!**


	10. I Have To Try

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**  
**Beta'd by SUNFLOWER3759 Thank you! **Mistakes are always my own****

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Chapter 10

June 2010

BPOV

Alice and I spend the afternoon catching up, filling in the last ten years of our lives. Carlisle is still at the hospital and Esme has expanded her design business. Alice finally married Jasper three years ago and moved to Texas where Jasper took over a family business from his uncle Peter. Jasper and Alice have been together since high school. I was surprised it took them so long to tie the knot until she explained what happened to Edward.

She couldn't leave him while he was struggling with my absence. Edward-much like me-suffered a deep depression. He refused to acknowledge it and dealt with it the only way he knew how. While I took up running, he buried himself in work. Charlie had been instrumental in subtlety helping Edward through the roughest patch … my death.

"...That's how he met Tanya. She was his partner for a long time before ..." She trails off, seeing me flinch at the new topic.

"... I knew something was up with Edward, and I understood the moment I saw you pull up ... He loves you too, B."

My eyes snap up to meet hers, the pain and weight of what she is telling me displayed openly for her to see.

"Don't be so surprised. Did you honestly believe he could ever stop loving you?"

It was too much to ask for but having Alice say it out loud kept the glimmer of hope alive.

"He loves Tanya now."

"I guess he does… They spent a lot of time together because Edward was always working, and if he was working so was Tanya. I don't know Bella. I never had a really good feeling about her, but I was grateful when Edward started smiling more. She seemed to have a positive effect on him."

Every word cut a little deeper.

"After all these years though I still don't feel as close a connection to her as I did … as I do to you."

It's sad, but I'm glad Alice hadn't replaced me too.

"Edward needed you Bella, and when you left you took a significant part of him with you. Tanya knew she didn't stand a chance while Edward still carried a torch. When you died, Edward hit rock bottom. Tanya saw the opportunity and fought her way into a spot resembling yours. But it's not real because she never truly belonged there."

I let her words soak in, praying she was right.

"He's happy now?"

She let out a heavy sigh, "He was … he could be again …" She let that hang for a moment.

"What are you going to do about it?" She asks, her tone challenging.

Moments later the door opens, and the rustling of shopping bags and keys hit me. The anticipation of seeing Edward had my stomach in knots.

"Hello … is that Charlie's truck outside?" Esme's warm voice fills the room, and Alice and I stand to greet her.

The nerves I had about seeing Edward moments ago are now eclipsed with fear of what Esme would think of me being here. She and Carlisle don't know many details of my past or my connection to Aro. To insure their safety, it was agreed that information was on a need to know basis. I have no idea what story they were given about me, but I do know they think I'm dead.

Esme's sharp intake of breath and the sudden tears that spring to her gentle eyes gives me hope that I'm at least welcomed. Seconds later the tears are falling as she makes her way toward me.

She cups my cheeks softly, her gaze mesmerizing … it's like looking into Edwards eyes,

"Bella … how?"

xxXXxx

I left Alice and Esme a little lighter and with purpose … to find Edward. He never came back to the house like Alice expected him too, so she gave me his address; an apartment he shares with Tanya. Well, it's Edward's apartment, but Tanya spends most of her time there. I pull up and park next to Edward's car, and as luck would have it he's here, just sitting in his car, deep in thought. I'm not too sure what to make of that.

I get out of the beast and catch Edward's eye. He doesn't look surprised to see me, but he doesn't rush out to greet me either. I walk over to a nearby tree and picnic table to wait patiently for him to get out and face me. I have my back to him when I hear his car door open and shut. Feeling his approach I get up prepared to take whatever he's willing to give.

If I'm going on looks alone, the odds aren't in my favor.

There's no relief on his face like there had been at the diner, and it pains me to see him this way because the sight of him brings me so much comfort. I appear to be having the opposite effect on him now as we stand here, surrounded by deafening silence.

I have to plant my feet to keep from jumping into his arms.

"I wish I could take away your pain."

"Me too..."

"I hope you don't hate me."

I didn't think it was possible but right now he feels further away than when I was in Paris.

"I almost wish that were possible…"

Ouch…

"I know I've put you in an impossible position. Well, not quite yet, and after I say what I have to, you just might hate me."

He lifts his eyes from the ground to meet mine. I'm not sure what exactly they are saying, but I'm glad to be looking at them again.

Every part of me screams to hold him.

He's waiting, and I doubt it's for my embrace, so I will my mouth to say the words, so frustrated at my inability and the effort it takes.

For most, this is trivial, inconsequential.

For me, it's ... unnatural, goes against the grain, but I try for him. I want him to know how I truly feel, but what comes out is so frustratingly unexpected … true, but not at all what I intended.

"Would it be too much to ask you to choose, me?"

My jaw quivers at the sight of his clenched fists and tight jaw. He looks about ready to explode.

"Why are you doing this to me?"

He doesn't pause for an answer.

"You left me Bella. It's been ten years, and for six of them I thought you were dead."

Enduring the bite in his voice is far worse than any punch or kick I've ever been dealt.

"When Charlie gave me that news it ... ripped… my …fucking ...heart ... out! How could you do that to me!" His anger and pain is palpable.

"I just wanted you to be happy." ... so I can steal it away from you, once again … just like this ... I realize.

God, is there no end to my selfishness?

"Great. Mission accomplished." His voice now totally void of emotion.

Silence.

He's focused on the ground again, and my eyes are trained on him. I've been denied the sight of him for too long to waste another second looking elsewhere. Good, bad, or indifferent-I refuse to tear my eyes away from this man in front of me.

"I can't do that to Tanya ... I've finally made peace, moved on, and you show up here like a fucking apparition."

It's not clear if he is talking to me or just out loud, and I don't know how to respond, but I have to try, right?

He doesn't want to hurt her.

He loves her.

Not me.

The pain slowly snakes itself around my chest and constricts, leaving me breathless.

"I needed to see you again." I say timidly.

It's a poor excuse, but I have a feeling saying 'I love you' now … if I could even manage it, would not be well received and, it quite frankly would just be cruel.

"I would have waited Bella ... I would have waited forever."

I've fallen on my own knife and his words have twisted it, sending a shooting pain right through my heart.

He's telling me we're over.

It's really too late.

It's not the outcome I wanted, but at least I know I tried. My only regret is opening up old wounds that should have never existed in the first place. I take a deliberate mental picture and etch it into my memory … his profile, the contour of his face, the sharpness in his jaw and the soft pout of his lips.

Seeing him again; is the best kind of torture.

Loving him is the best pain.

Feeling it reminds me it was real, once upon a time.

I close the distance between us.

It's wrong, but I'm tired of fighting, and if this is the last time I'll see him I need to see his face, his eyes, up close. I reach out and cup his jaw, gently stroking the stubble of his cheek and tilt his face toward me, thankful he isn't pulling away. The heat of him under my fingertips, the sight and smell of him this close has my insides quivering with the strongest desire to be his Bella. Again the words are on the tip of my tongue like they were ten years ago when we said goodbye; only this time he is not asking me to stay.

I swallow past the lump in my throat and hope my expression once again conveys what I've never been able to say. He also takes his time scanning my features before meeting my eyes. We both know this is goodbye ... goodbye without the promise of tomorrow. My hands slowly slide down his neck, shoulders, chest and abs before falling to my sides, our fingers barely grazing. My heart thundering in my chest, our shallow breaths the only sounds I hear.

Words would only make this harder; hurt more.

I silently step back and turn, slowly walking away. I head for the truck, but after a few more steps I feel the need to run, so I pass the truck and start jogging, picking up my pace until I'm running faster.

It's not enough.

I need to feel the burn.

The ache.

Somewhere else … anywhere else, but where it is currently hurting the most.

I push my legs harder until I'm sprinting.

He doesn't stop me.

Running has been a source of comfort over the years. The feel of the wind in my face, the pounding of my feet against the pavement clears my mind. I desperately need that comfort and clarity now. I push even harder letting my legs carry me farther away from my heart. My lungs suck in air steadily as my muscles continue to take a beating. I can run for miles before feeling any fatigue, so simply running won't give me the desired effect that sprinting could.

Spring time in Paris had me running eight to ten miles a day. Chicago in the summer doesn't have the same effect. Finally reaching my peak, I have succeeded in displacing some of the pain to more manageable areas. I no longer am able to sustain my pace, so I slow down and find myself nearing some old stomping grounds.

Several miles later I spot the church. I used to collect behind this church. I start jogging as I get closer until I'm walking the last few blocks. I never took the time to truly appreciate the building. It's majestic among the drab backdrop. When I would come here, it was in the dead of night. I came for one thing, and one thing only, then I was out. I stop in front on the church and pull out my phone to call Charlie now that my breathing has regulated.

"Swan," Charlie's gruff voice fills my ear.

"I'm out C." He knows what that means.

"Where to kid?" He asks with a twinge of disappointment that breaks my heart just a little bit more. Spending time back here has only strengthened our bond. We fill a void in each other's lives and having to part this way once again, is disheartening.

"Paris," I say confidently. I hadn't realized it at the time, but I led a peaceful life during my exile in Paris.

Peace is what I need now.

"You sure?"

"Yes, and I'm sorry, I left your truck at Edward's place."

"Where are you?"

"That church on N. Carpenter."

"How'd you get all the way over there?"

"Ran."

"Jesus Marie, how long have you been running? That's got to be close to twenty miles."

It's not. Maybe closer to ten or twelve running through short cuts, might be twenty driving.

"It's not that far."

"Stay put I'll come pick you up."

* * *

**A/N**

**So what did you think? I hope you aren't too disappointed that E and B didn't fall into each others arms and forget the rest of the world. That's just not how it played out. **

**Warning: The next chapter gets a bit violent, graphic … bloody, the body count goes up and it all happens in a church so if any of that bothers you please skip Chapter 11 (although… my beta, SUNFLOWER3759 says it's the best chapter so far!)**

**Shout Out to fellow new and semi-new writers who have read, reviewed, and may have even sent you my way! **  
_The Songs of Our Lives by: luvtwilight4eva_  
_This life is not an easy one. It's marked by two consistencies: life and death. Everything in between those are just...songs of one's life. Follow Edward and Bella as they contend with the various songs that have marked their lives. _

_Volturi Bed & Breakfast by: Lovepotionsbrewer _  
_Bella Swan makes the only logical decision when her father dies a year before she graduates from college. She buys a Vermont Bed and Breakfast with the unexpected inheritance. Edward is a native Vermonter who thinks he knows everything about the kind of person who moves into his State. Eventual lemons - minimal angst. Lots of Vermont-made, syrupy sweetness._

**Thank you all again for following, reading, and reviewing! **

**I love hearing from you… **

**It only takes a second to do something that means so much to every writer but especially to new ones… Thank You!**


	11. Forgive Me Father

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**  
**Beta'd by SUNFLOWER3759 Thank you! **Mistakes are always my own****

**I know you've been anxious for this update so ... Enjoy!**

* * *

Chapter 11

BPOV

I haven't been inside of a church in years.

I went a few times with Edward, and a few times alone in Paris, but I just can't get past the idea of an all-powerful, and merciful God. If there was such a man, why would he have allowed children to grow up the way I did? And why would he allow so many others to be caught in similar situations who weren't as lucky as I was?

Thinking of myself as lucky is laughable.

I should have died many times over by now, but no, I live to hurt another day.

If there is a heaven, those that ended up there are the lucky ones. I've got a one way ticket to hell once I'm done living this hell-on-earth I'm living in now. People like Aro and my parents had drugs to escape their personal hell.

I had nothing.

Then I had Edward.

Then, I had the hope of being with Edward again.

Now, I have neither.

I'm lost … with no direction ... no purpose.

My old life, my new life ... neither make sense anymore.

People pray at times like these.

The disbeliever in me has nothing left to lose.

So I take a knee in front of this grand altar… before a God I don't understand, and whoever else listens to the prayers of the lost and forsaken like me.

I silently ask for forgiveness and direction.

I confess my sins and wait for some sort of sign-some epiphany-or weight to be lifted off my shoulders.

I get a response ... but it's not exactly what I was expecting. It comes in the form of six, maybe seven pairs of shoes toward the front of the church behind my kneeling form. I don't move my head, but I open my eyes to peek up through my lashes at the statue before me.

He must be fucking with me right now.

… Mocking me at this very moment.

If this is your way of telling me my time is up, you have another thing coming.

I think, and hope that someone up there is watching out for me because the hell I know is better than the hell I don't.

I'm not dying in your house today, and I'm not apologizing for the mess I'm going to make either.

I subtlety retrieve the small knife strapped to my ankle. It's small, but it's deadly sharp. I never leave home without it.

Old habits never die.

The church is quiet.

With no one else around you could hear a pin drop. So it's funny these goons think they can sneak up on me. That fact alone tells me I'm dealing with low men, which is probably why there are so many.

They have guns; I hear the all too familiar clicks and cocks.

I'm not too concerned though. If they wanted me dead, they would have fired already. There are seven of them, and they want to take me alive … over my dead body.

I haven't had this much adrenaline pumping through my veins in ten years. Gearing up this way feels fucking amazing and ironically comforting.

I clear my mind and focus on their footsteps, their breathing, and their nervous twitches.

You can hear a lot when you actually listen.

I dissect their behavior and methodically plan my attack.

Isabella is back, and I'm eager to play.

There are three closing in quickly behind me and the other four are farther out, flanking them in the wings. The men flanking left are nervous. They are slowly taking their cues from the more eager. They'll hesitate just long enough, which means they'll be last.

The three behind me are more deliberate, rushing in closer ...

Closer ... I grip my knife tight, blade out.

Forgive me Father for I'm about to sin…

With that thought, I swiftly stand and swing the knife right through the necks of my first and second victims. It easily slices through both carotid arteries like warm butter. Vic one drops his gun to grab his neck in an attempt to stop the gush of blood. I catch it with my left hand effortlessly positioning my finger on the trigger and fire off a couple rounds into the right wing as my knife continues on its current trajectory, only managing to nick victim number three.

The bullets hit dead on, killing vic four. Vic three is bringing his gun down on my head, and as I sidestep out of the way the asshole in the right wing fires his gun, missing me and hitting vic three. I fire three more rounds in his direction, but I'm off balance and miss, only grazing his shoulder and pissing him off. He's yelling profanities as he charges at me. I check the left wing briefly to see what my nervous nellies are doing … hesitating, watching.

Perfect.

Right wing asshole is throwing punches, but he's bulky and clumsy, lacks the finesse and agility of a boxer. I'm much smaller in comparison, and he must think his size gives him an advantage or he's just really fucking dumb. I humor him, let him take a few more swings and give our audience a minute to wet themselves. He's frustrated and already out of breath, so I put him out of his misery. He takes a final, feeble swing, and I duck down and punch his junk with as much force as I could throw. He falls to his knees, hunched over, cupping his crotch trying to cry out in agony, but he barely lets out a whisper.

I walk around him, grab a fist full of hair and pull his head back exposing his neck.

I find the last two in the wings and hold their gaze as I slit asshole's throat.

One takes off running.

If he's smart and leaves, he will be the first to have ever seen my face and live to tell about it.

Five of whom I presume are Aro's men are dead. I took them out barely stretching any muscles. I'm a little disappointed and frankly insulted. Someone obviously sent amateurs-babies. Just because I've been out of the business, doesn't mean I've stopped training. I've had nothing but time to hone my skills.

No one was going to catch me off guard … no one except him ... my kryptonite.

I heard shuffling again and immediately was on guard.

I'm looking at my last victim, when Edward and Tanya are dragged in-cuffed.

I lock eyes with Edward-slightly beaten and angry.

I don't budge.

Fuck, this isn't good.

Keeping the left-wing man in my periphery and quickly weighing my options, I remember that I have one bullet left and three goons with guns.

I could escape on my own easily, but what happens to them?

If I stay I could probably save one but ... which one?

I can't let them kill Edward, and I can't let Edward suffer the loss of Tanya.

I won't do that to him again.

One of these bastards will shoot, and there is nothing I can do about it.

"We only came for you, Isabella." Goon number one says.

"We don't have to hurt them but we will." He emphasizes by tightening his arm around Edward's neck to which Edward responded by jabbing him in the gut with his elbow.

He may not be able to best me, but he can sure as hell take on those two. The fact that he's been cuffed and ruffed up only means they must have gotten Tanya first and used her against him, just as they are using him against me.

I've trained some with Edward; he's every bit the fighter I am.

The rage in his eyes matches mine, which only solidifies my earlier assumption. Tanya was a bargaining chip, and he folded. I can see his concern as he glances at her. Not that I needed his concern, but it would have been nice.

"We'll let them go. Aro just wants you ... alive." Goon number two pipes up.

Aro's alive?

Of course, he is.

This shouldn't actually surprise either Edward or me but now we both know there's a narc on the squad.

I don't have to think.

I already know what I have to do.

As furious as I am about it, I have to stand down.

I need to get to Aro.

I'm not delusional to think I stand a chance at making it out of this alive, but if I don't go Edward and Tanya's days are numbered. Hell they may already be numbered regardless, but if I can manage to take out Aro, then they stand a chance.

All I need is one lucky swipe or hit.

I should have taken Aro's life when I had the chance instead of cooperating to save myself.

"Okay, but we are doing this my way." I order with finality.

"NO! Don't y ..." Edward yells before he's choked again.

"Enough!" I yell ... I can hear Edward struggling against the hold, but I don't dare look him in the eye.

It's too late to worry about me now. He has to know that this is the only option. He has Tanya now; he's going to be happy again. Just like he was before I arrived and messed up his life a second time.

The goons obviously share a brain, looking to each other before agreeing. They may be taking me, but I'm calling the shots.

"Cuff them to each other and toss me the keys."

They do as I say, like good little minions. I don't want Edward following, and I don't want him here all night in handcuffs. He probably needs a doctor. I'm sure Tanya will make that happen.

"Bella stop ..." Edward weakly tries to get my attention. With keys in hand, I toss them up onto the second level. That will give us a big enough head start. We have to move quickly, Charlie will be here any minute, and I can't risk him getting in the way.

So without a parting glance I leave with Aro's minions right behind me.

I have sins to atone for, and it's time to meet my maker.

* * *

**A/N**

**I'm hiding behind my hands, peeking through my fingers, too scared to read the reviews, but absolutely dying to know what everyone thought … Sunflower says it's the best so far; was she right?**

**Last chapter was the most reviews for any one chapter and we are now 33 reviews away from 200! I'm so thrilled that you take the time to read please tell me your thoughts too. **

**Thirty-Three isn't a lot … you can smash that easy, lol! **

**Loved it; I want to know. **

**Hated it … ya, I still want to know. **

**Want to see B with some hot Parisian lover, lol, yes you, I want to know that too! **

**Next Chapter will be EPOV! It's never long enough but you get a taste of what's going on in his head.**

**Also, I will be entering my first contest … TLS Angst Contest … didn't think I'd have something worth entering but I'm excited and nervous to throw my hat in. Wish me luck; I'm sure I'll need it. **

**Put me on author alert if you want new story updates. I have another story already written just needs some fine tuning and Sunflower magic.**

**Thank you all again for following, lurking, reading, and reviewing! **

**It only takes a second to do something that means so much to every writer but especially to new ones… **

**Phew … that was a long one!**

**Thank You!**


	12. Connecting The Dots

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**  
**Beta'd by SunflowerFran Thank you! **Mistakes are always my own****

**So sorry for the late update … E had a few more things he wanted me to squeeze in there and I couldn't ignore E, nope … I could listen to that boy all day!**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Chapter 12

EPOV

Finally, the fucking asshole pulls the burlap bag off my head as we pull up to a church. Tanya has been distant, quiet, and I'm wondering if she's in shock. It's not like she's never trained for this, but the stress of the situation is definitely weighing on her. I can see the unshed tears gathering.

"Tanya you okay?"

"I'm fine. How about you? Your eye looks swollen."

"I'd be better if these fuckers would tell us what the hell is going on!" I shout as I shove my shoulder into the side of the van.

"Don't Edward; you'll just make them mad!" She scolds me.

Being punched while cuffed with a bag over my head has me pissed, and I don't give a fuck right now! At least they haven't touched Tanya. If they didn't have guns we wouldn't be here since our captors are not the savviest of criminals; they are sloppy, out of shape, mindless fucks that hide behind those guns.

"What the hell are we doing here?" I demand. Not that it does me any good since the two mute bastards, Twiddle Dee and Twiddle Dumb haven't answered a single question I've asked.

They pull over and drag us into the back door. I have no idea what's about to happen here but as soon as we make it to the alter I notice the bodies.

The smell of gun shots and blood hang heavy in the air.

It was a massacre and Bella is in the midst of it all.

I know that look on her face, she's Isabella right now, and I'm willing to bet she just killed these fuckers.

She looks right at me with a stone cold glare. Her gaze is calculating, and I hope she doesn't do anything rash. This is nothing she can't handle but the odds don't look good for us, and I'm not about to watch her risk everything again. What is she even doing here? It was pure unadulterated torture to let her go and as much as I wanted her to stay … for what, I couldn't tell you, I just did, I'm a fucking mess … I hoped she would have left Chicago by now. It's not safe, and this, among other things, is exactly what I was afraid of.

She's wide open standing with her back against a large pillar; a gun in one hand, a small knife in the other.

Other than her stance and weapons she doesn't look like she just fought and killed five grown men. I'm still unbelievably angry, but seeing this part of her has always turned me on, and this time, as inappropriate as it may be … is no different. I can feel the tightening in my jeans already. The control it takes to keep my distance has been overwhelming, and the stress of it manifests itself through anger. Nothing feels right; nothing ever really did...

"We only came for you, Isabella," Twiddle Dee, the asshole holding Tanya, says. Stupid fuck even sounds scared. I look over to make sure he isn't hurting her, and he isn't. His hold is loose, and she probably could pull away and disarm him cuffed if she wanted to.

"We don't have to hurt them but we will."

I'm distracted from that thought when this Twiddle dumb asshole chokes me. I quickly elbow him hard on instinct and he lets out a low grunt shoving the gun hard against my temple.

I'm fuming inside.

All I want to do is get my hands on him and show him how to use a gun by putting a bullet through his head.

Looking from Bella to Tanya, I know Bella can take care of herself, but I'm worried about Tanya.

She seems so uninvolved, as though she's a spectator instead of a prisoner.

The cop in her has checked out, and it's starting to unnerve me.

"We'll let them go. Aro just wants you ... alive."

What the fuck!

Aro?

No way!

Our guys are solid.

I've worked with every one of them; we're like brothers.

There's no way we have a mole...

I look at Tanya expecting to see her equally shocked, but she won't meet my eyes.

"Tanya," I call her through clenched teeth, just loud enough that I know she heard me as the unsettling feelings devour me…

No...

No fucking way ...

But there it is ...

Guilt.

I'm sure the color has completely drained from my face.

All this time … I've been such a fool.

Like shuffling a deck of cards, I playback every memory, and suddenly pieces that never fit started locking into place.

All the fucking dots were connecting.

Tanya was the perfect mole, and I practically hand fed her everything she needed to help Aro and get to Bella.

My head is spinning, and my stomach is turning with these revelations and my hand in it all.

"Okay, but we are doing this my way." Bella announces, but I quickly shout, "NO! Don't y ..."

... You leave me again ... Was what I was trying to get out but Twiddle dumb-fuck started choking me harder with his gun firmly in place again.

I almost wish he'd just shoot me and get it over with.

Tanya has looked away again, and it's a good thing because she wouldn't like what she'd find on my face right now.

Disgust.

There are no words for the rage that's coursing through my veins.

At her.

At the fucking twins.

At this situation that she probably knew all about!

I can't think straight, and I want to somehow warn Bella.

But of what?

Anything I could tell her right now can only distract her instead of help her right now.

"Enough!" She yells as I fall to my knees. My head is still reeling, and the lack of oxygen isn't helping. I'm almost passed out before he loosens his hold so I can breathe.

"Cuff them to each other and toss me the keys." She's taking charge of the mindless twins. They do as she says, linking our cuffs.

She's seconds from walking out. So as forcefully as I can manage I yell, "Bella Stop..."

She doesn't pay any attention and walks out, the double doors slamming shut behind them.

Her dismissal pisses me off even more.

I have so much aggression build up that being cuffed to Tanya right now is too tempting.

I have questions, and I might kill her before I get answers.

"You're the mole." I grit out.

I wasn't asking, and she wasn't denying.

Her tears only fuel my hatred.

"Get up," I yank the cuffs and force her to her feet. "We have to find the keys."

"Edward I can explain."

Her pleading does nothing to temper the murderous rage.

Hearing this explanation will undoubtedly test my tolerance, but if she has an explanation I have to hear it.

I have to know how Aro got to her.

What he had on her to keep her living a lie.

I can't wrap my head around how the only two women I ever cared about were involved with Aro Volturi.

The differences between them are too numerous to count, but they had him in common.

I pursued Bella relentlessly. She tried to push me away, and I wanted her in spite of herself and her shortcomings, but the tables were turned with Tanya. She pursued me. Suddenly I was the one pushing away while Tanya was relentless. I remained faithful to Bella. I knew she would come back to me until I got the devastating news of her death. I drilled the Chief for weeks about it, but he remained adamant-his story never wavering.

Coming to terms with it broke me.

Tanya helped pick up the pieces, and I selfishly let her. The wall I built between us slowly came down … I greedily took the comfort she offered, desperate to ease some of my grief … the loss was too much for me, and slowly as the years passed, one thing lead to another and here we are-cuffed to each other figuratively and physically.

"I didn't know I was going to fall in love with you." I scoff.

"Is that supposed to make me feel better because if that's your explanation, it sucks and I know you can do better than that!"

"What I'm trying to say is that, loving you is real. I'm sorry I hurt you and Bella. I love you both."

I was only half listening; my attention split between finding the keys and her excuses, but this caught my attention.

Is she mental? Did I somehow miss her medical imbalance?

I look at her for the first time since dragging her up here.

"What do you mean you love us both? You're not making any sense Tanya!"

"My name isn't Tanya.

It's Kate ... I knew Bella before she became ... Isabella.

She was my best friend, my sister, a long time ago."

Realization was starting to break through.

Kate … Kate Volturi … Bella's only childhood friend ... Aro's daughter.

The church doors open and swing shut.

There's a commotion downstairs, and I hear the chief radioing for backup.

"Get a trace on her phone!" Someone orders.

"BELLA!"

Charlie's call echoes though the large, silent church.

* * *

**A/N**

**So some of you already guessed T wasn't so innocent, and if you had no clue … bless your heart! lol :) Hope I was able to surprise at least one of you. **

**This one wasn't as exciting as last weeks update; not sure if I'll be able to top that chapter but … Bad Ass B is back next update … B and Aro will be reunited so hold on tight; we are in for a bumpy ride.**

***HUGS* and Huge Thank You for SmAsHiNg my 200 review goal! … Knew you could do it! … Can't tell you how much it means to me. **

**We have a few new readers and some new followers … I'd love to hear from you, if I haven't already! Good, bad, or indifferent I want to hear your thoughts. **

**We are at 224 reviews! What do you think … can we hit 260? **

**36 Reviews People; Smash it! Please and thank you :)**

**If you haven't checked out TLS Angst contest entries, you're missing out. There are some really good ones and I'm not ashamed to admit they kicked my story's butt. I have my favorites and I'm not alone, so Go, Read, and please Review.**

**It only takes a second to do something that means so much to every writer but especially to new ones… **

**Thanks, you're the Best!**


	13. Meeting My Maker

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**

**Beta'd by SunflowerFran Thank you! **Mistakes are always my own****

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Chapter 13

BPOV

I get into the car, and I see that my runaway didn't get very far. He's in the driver seat. Stupid asshole truly has a death wish. He still looks nervous and rightfully so because he won't get away from me this time.

At least my reputation will remain intact.

As soon as they take me to Aro none of them will make it out of the car. It's a shame-the privilege of watching this reunion will be ticket worthy. Nobody cuffs me, big mistake number one. They took the gun I carried, but I still have my knife. Huge mistake number two. I managed to tuck it into the waistband of my pants without anyone noticing, and no one bothered to frisk me. I have to control my breathing-careful not to move my stomach too much, so it doesn't cut into me.

They seemed to try to give me some space as we piled into the car, but I'm still sandwiched between the other nervous wingman, and the one who had choked Edward.

He's first on my list.

We are driving for a while before we hit the warehouse district. Aro has two buildings in this area that he does business in. He must have picked up something new in the area. I doubt he'd return to a raided hot spot, but staying in this area, close to home, is his M.O. He doesn't do well with change and likes to keep things familiar. I was hoping we would be going someplace I knew. Aro having home court advantage was not something I was looking forward to. I try not to think about it and instead keep my appearance relaxed and void of emotion. Meanwhile, my head calculates and replays the death of every one of these poor, stupid bastards.

My fate has been decided.

I have nothing left.

I should just enjoy the ride and take out as many of Aro's minions as I can while I still can.

We pull up to an office building. It doesn't look abandoned, but it does look as if it's going through renovations. There are construction and building materials all around. We're coming to a stop and my nerves spike right before a wave of calm washes over me. I reach for my knife and as soon as the car is in park, my left elbow makes contact with the left guy's nose, breaking it, simultaneously my right hand stabs the guy to my right, sinking the blade of my knife into his throat.

That's for Edward asshole!

The goon in the passenger seat is screaming at the goon with the broken nose. He pulls his gun on me and I grab his hand giving him a palm punch to the elbow, dislocating it. He cries out in pain and tries to pull his arm back, but I have a solid grip on it and pull the trigger firing at the driver quickly. I pull the gun away and shoot him in the head before turning to broken nose, who managed to make it out of the car and is running away. He's not far, and my aim is pretty accurate as I shoot him in the back.

Laughing ...

I hear the unmistakably, cheerful laugh of Aro Volturi. He's clapping his hands and laughing, and it sounds like nails moving down a chalkboard.

"Well done, Isabella. Well done," He's says like a proud papa.

I don't waste a minute prying my knife out of the still-warm, bloodied body.

Aro has a man with his gun drawn on me.

I don't care, I open the door…

"Don't move," Aro's minion yells.

"Don't shoot her..." Aro humorously demands, as I fling my knife at him mid laugh ... it catches him off guard, he sidesteps it a second too late, and it gets him in the arm.

"FUCK!" He yells, all signs of humor gone, pulling out the knife and flinging it back at me. I don't think he was trying to kill me just yet, either way he was unsuccessful.

"Now, now Isabella, is that any way to greet me?" His voice strained, remarkably holding in his temper as his hand covers the open wound. "I've been waiting for you for a long time my dear."

I reach down to retrieve my knife.

Aro makes a sound of disapproval, "Don't even think about it Isabella. You've done enough damage with your … toy." He gestures me to follow, and I reluctantly leave my knife behind. It wasn't that I wanted it as an advantage in a fight-although it has served that purpose many times. No, it had more sentimental value. I have had that knife for a long time, as long as I can remember. It was a gift from Kate. She had given it to me one day when I came over shaking because one of the street thugs had been harassing me. She told me if they ever got too close to stab them and run to her because no one would follow me to Aro's and cause trouble. Not long after that was when she disappeared, and the knife was all I had left of her.

He leads the way into the building, and I follow at gun point. We reach a wide open area that had been gutted and prepared for remodeling. In the room Aro had about fifteen, maybe more, of his minions. They closed ranks around me as one of them tended to Aro's arm.

"So Isabella, tell me, how have you been? Those new friends of yours treating you well, keeping you comfortable?"

I don't respond.

This isn't a family reunion, and I'm not here to talk about my life.

He glares at me not liking my silence.

"I think you owe me a little respect Isabella." He reprimands me like a child.

"Maybe you've forgotten what that means? ... Perhaps you need a little reminder." He scans the crowd.

"Perhaps you should show me yourself." I challenge him, hoping to egg him into facing me himself.

He lets out a low chuckle, "I would, but it seems you've put me at a disadvantage." He pats the fresh bandage and signals one of his men.

A short man just a little taller than I am steps up and appraises me.

He isn't impressed, and neither was I.

There are some catcalls and words of encouragement.

Some jeering and snickering.

He, like many others before him, underestimates me.

He comes at me fast being egged on by the group and I knocked him hard to the ground using his own momentum. I jumped on his back and quickly snapped his neck. There were various intakes of breath, and surprised gasps, and several guys shuffling around, mumbling to each other.

If I didn't have their attention before; I do now.

Aro beams at me and wordlessly sends another guy in after me.

This one's more cautious. He doesn't rush in, apparently learning from what happened to the first guy. Instead, he tries a different approach, moving in slowly, and then trying to swing at me.

That's not going to fly.

He keeps swinging, and I keep dodging.

We circle like that for a while, he's being excessively cautious, and I'm waiting until he begins to tire from the effort. I know I'm going to have to take a hit to get close enough to kill him, but I'm sure as hell not going to rush that part. He can let off some steam swinging at air first. There's some chuckling in the group, and it distracts him mid-swing, so I move in to palm strike his nose, instantly breaking it.

Whoever said that move kills was high. I've used it many times, and it has never killed anyone. It is, however, an effective way to break their nose and cripple them with pain. While he's distracted with his nose, I round him and kick his back hard. He surges forward and the crowd parts, sending him into a window and shattering it, glass flying everywhere. I pull him back, and he falls to the ground conveniently, so that I can snap his neck too.

This is how the time passes.

Aro sends one in, and I kill them, one by one, but now I'm getting tired. Each fight is a little more difficult than the last with no break in between. A few eager assholes who noticed my fatigue have been able to connect their punches, and I am feeling the sting of the cuts and bruises they've left behind.

They all know who I am now, and every single one of them wants bragging rights.

They'll be waiting a long time.

Aro finally calls off the hounds and takes center stage. He looks me over, and I do the same. His bandage is soaked through. This sick bastard would rather take his time to enjoy watching me take a beating, rather than end me quickly so he can take care of his injury before he bleeds to death.

"It's nice to see you're not so infallible Isabella ... Even you bleed red."

I take a staggered step forward, and he backhands me. Before I could react with a sudden energy spike, his guys are holding me back.

"That's for stabbing me..." He says, and then backhands me again. His guys release their hold as Aro kicks me and I stumble to the ground and fall on the scattered glass. There was a large piece that pierced my leg. I flinch as I yank it out.

"... and that's for turning on me!" He spits out.

I get to my feet not wanting to give him the satisfaction …refusing to appear weak and helpless, even though, at this moment, I am just that.

He advances toward me and we exchange blows.

Our movements in sync with each other.

It almost felt like a training day only this time I'm fighting for my life.

Every movement cost me more than I had to give.

I knew I couldn't keep this up much longer.

I had to take the next available opportunity.

Aro's bandage had come off at some point, and he was now openly bleeding. I grabbed his injured arm and wrenched it toward me successfully widening the gash. He cries out in pain but otherwise doesn't acknowledge it. The move gave him the opportunity to grab hold of me as he delivered a swift kick to my gut.

It sucked all the breath out of me and I fell to my knees gasping for air.

Aro had the advantage, and he took it.

His blows coming harder, relentlessly, until a heavy fog fell over me and I go limp.

-

My lids are heavy, but I force them open.

I don't know how long I was out, and I'm surprised to be still alive … barely. It only felt like a minute, but it had to be more because I'm alone now. I don't hear anything besides the throbbing and the pounding of my head, and I don't see anyone through my blurred vision.

I've been left for dead.

The taste of blood on my tongue, and the metallic smell of blood hangs heavy in the air.

I've thought a lot about the way I'd die.

Someone like me, born into this life can't help but end up in a gutter somewhere. I hoped I'd escaped that fate.

Ending up here, and giving my life this way so he can have his.

It's fitting.

It has been the only selfless thing I've done since I've been back.

I should have stayed away.

I deserve this for the pain I've caused.

I lay here broken and alone, too stubborn to close my eyes, struggling to breathe.

I don't know if I'll make it through the night or if this will be the last breath I take.

All of these thoughts, no matter how scary they seem, are only second to his face …

Edward.

The heartache and pain of what I've lost hurts more than the broken bones …

Cuts deeper than the gashes …

And drains all my resolve, more than my weary muscles ...

Warm tears pool and slide down across my face and onto the cold slab of concrete.

"Be happy Edward … I'll always love you."

I close my eyes and welcome the sudden warmth that overtakes me, as sparkling, green eyes, and copper hair fill my thoughts in brilliant Technicolor.

* * *

**A/N**

**So now we are back to the Prologue … I know some of you wanted this to go differently but we had to get to the prologue eventually … **

**What did you think? Does B make it? Does E go after her? Have we seen the last of Aro? **

**Answers are all coming as we wrap up this fic. We only have three more regular chapters and maybe an Epi.**

**Next Chapter is EPOV.**

**So we didn't make my 260 review goal. We were only nine short :( so no pleading for reviews this time … leave one because you feel like I deserve one.**

**Thanks so much for reading!**


	14. Praying For Miracles

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**

**Beta'd by SunflowerFran Thank you! **Mistakes are always my own****

**Maybe Keep a Tissue Handy … Just in Case.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Chapter 14

EPOV

The Chief and I follow the trace on Bella's phone to an out of the way warehouse being renovated for an office building. We pull up, and I'm immediately on guard. There doesn't appear to be anyone around, but there are a lot of tire tracks and blood.

No bodies, just lots of blood.

I have a sinking feeling in my gut, my gun poised to fire.

I can't wait for reinforcements, and I have a feeling this is Charlie acting … not the Chief, because he is as quick as I am to storm the building.

We make our way hastily but silently inside.

No words have to be exchanged; we know the drill.

I'm trying to stay positive and shake the dread that creeps up my spine as I take in the destruction around me. Charlie and I exchange a glance at each other thinking the same thing. Something horrific, definitely happened here, and Bella was part of it, or at least her phone is somewhere in here.

We clear the front rooms and Charlie gestures for me to head up while he finishes the first floor. I'm about to object because while there is blood on the stairs the source of it is clearly on this level, but I've learned not to question his decisions. I nod and make my way upstairs, hugging the wall and keeping my guard up.

"Edward she's here!" Charlie yells before I make it up the steps.

I run back down, completely dropping my guard as I raced to them.

"I have to go out to make sure they have an ambulance en route, and I can't get a clear signal. I'll be right back. Don't move her!"

I wave him off and fall to the floor in front of her, taking inventory of the damage.

I think her eyes are slightly open.

"Bella, baby, can you hear me?"

She doesn't move; no response at all.

"Can you open your eyes? Can you see me? ... I'm here B ... I'm here. You're going to be okay." I fight the tears because I know it's the last thing she'd want to see.

My fears are coming to fruition and panic is setting in.

Then I see her lips move.

She's saying something.

I'm holding my breath and straining to listen, but all I hear is mumbling.

I can't make it out.

I don't understand, but then I hear it …

Clearly.

For the first time, falling from her battered, bloodied lips.

"... Love you."

She says before she closes her eyes.

She said it …

My heart clenches ...

She said the God damn words!

Ten fucking years I've waited for those words, and she's saying it now.

She's giving up ...

"Bella wake up!"

I'm cupping her cheek trying to rouse her.

"You don't get to say those words to me and then give up!

... It doesn't count Bella!

It doesn't fucking count." I whisper the last part to myself.

I'm so unbelievably angry with her, with myself, I can barely see straight.

There is no way she ended up like this unless she gave up.

I've seen her fight, and I saw the body count at the church. She's still at the top of her game. No one could have done this to her without her consent, and if she fought and still ended up like this then I don't even want to think ...

About what she must have endured …

About what I'm going to do to Aro ... when I get my hands on him.

"You do not get to give up on me ...

Not now.

You fight B ... like you've never fought before…

Damn it, please."

I tell her sternly while rubbing her cheek as hard as I dare … resisting the urge to slap her.

"Do you hear me? You fight!"

I check her pulse again.

It's too weak, but it's there.

"Damn it Bella. Don't you dare fucking leave me again. I'll never forgive you this time. Do you hear me! I'll never forgive you … not in this life and not in the next!" Hoping my empty threat would bring her back.

She's in a fetal position on the floor.

There's so much blood; I hope to hell this isn't all hers.

I pull off my shirt and start ripping it up, thankful to have some outlet for my anger.

For my frustration ...

For my fear ….

There's a gash on her leg that I need to tie off; it's the only one I can actually see. There's so much blood I just want to know where it's all coming from.

I want to carry her out of here, but I can't move her and risk further injury.

Damn it she's going bleed out...

I hear the sirens in the distance getting closer, and for the first time ever they bring me relief.

It's fucking music to my ears.

With nothing left to do but wait I crouch down, getting closer, as close as I can without moving her too much. I'm practically covering her body with mine wanting to help somehow.

I take her hand gently lacing our fingers and wrap my arm around her, like I've wanted to do every day since she reappeared.

All this time wasted.

Being angry for what?

It didn't help or change anything.

She's motionless and barely breathing; more fragile and broken than I've ever seen anyone before.

And I'm scared shitless of what that means.

I can't lose her to death again.

I won't survive it this time.

"Don't you go into any bright lights B ... Stay with me.

You are the strongest person I know.

You'll beat this too ...

You'll be fine.

I won't let you down again.

I love you.

I loved you the moment you snubbed me." The memory bringing me some comfort.

"I'll always love you…" I swallow hard and take a breath, struggling to keep calm.

There will never be anyone for me but her.

I've known that all along.

I'm feeling physically ill thinking about Tanya and our part in all of this.

"If you can hear me I just want you to know I'm sorry.

I didn't know …

I didn't know ..."

Saying what I had to say I kiss her bloodied knuckles, and pray for a miracle.

* * *

**A/N**

**Whacha think… You still with me? Everyone okay? **

**So E went after her. How could he not… Will B make it?**

**If you are looking for some new fics to start I have a few Recs. These are relatively new… Go read and please show some love by reviewing.**

_California Dreamin' by: chocaholic123_  
_Summary:_  
_1967. Summer stalked in like a lion that year, fierce and angry; looking for someone to eat. Among the hippies, free love and Vietnam, we were forced to grow up, whether we wanted to or not._

_A Crack In The Door by: janewithay_  
_Summary: _  
_A lonely bartender on Cape Cod and a girl no one has ever seen. Together they form a tentative friendship through a crack between their doors ... but will the crack open wide enough to let love in? AH rated M for adult themes and situations._

_Rescission by: GeekChic12_  
_Summary: _  
_We met. We got off. We went home. We weren't lovers. We weren't even friends. We were f- buddies. It worked... Until it didn't. AH, ExB. Rated M for a reason._

**Again no pleading for reviews … Leave one because you feel like I deserve one.**

**Thank you so much for pimping, following, lurking, reading, and all your generous reviews. **

**See you all next week. :)**


	15. Life-Giving Blood

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**

**Beta'd by SunflowerFran Thank you! **Mistakes are always my own ... I tinkered a bit, hopefully nothing grammatically horrendous!****

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Chapter 15

BPOV

I've been locked in my head like a caged animal, screaming to get out, and now I'm finally starting to regain some control. I feel my body slowly responding, and my eyes eagerly flutter open to bright lights and probing fingers.

"Get out of my face asshole!" I meant that to come out stern and threatening, but I'm so groggy that it sounded weak and raspy. My vision begins to adjust, and the haziness dissipates bringing back some new found focus. I instantly felt ashamed once I realized I just insulted someone who is obviously trying to help me.

Charlie's deep laugh fills my ears and the nurse who was tending to me glares at him before she steps out. I'm trying to sit up, but my body is too heavy and stiff.

"Help me up C." I beg.

I want to get out of here.

I hate hospitals and I hate feeling helpless even more.

"Oh no, you don't." He rests a hand on my shoulder and gently presses, keeping me from attempting that again. "You're not going anywhere just yet. How you feeling kid?"

I shrug; I'm a little disoriented, I'm lightheaded, my body feels weird, and my mouth feels like I've been sucking on cotton balls, but I'm alive.

"I'm alive; how long have I been out?"

"A little over eight weeks …"

What. The. Fuck.

"… Your injuries were so severe they had to put you in a medically induced coma … give your body a chance to heal … it was touch and go for a while … you almost died B."

"Aro?" What happened to him?

Afraid to hope for good news ... please … please …

I can't do this again.

"I'm not too sure …"

Fuck, I knew it; no offense to C, but the goddamn FEDs can't do anything right.

"… I thought you might be able to shed some light on that. He was already long gone when we found you …"

Of course he was … I can't trust anyone.

Tears begin to sting my too dry eyes, but I don't allow them to fall.

I'm on my own … nothing new there.

I feel myself shutting down and for the briefest second Edward crosses my mind.

Where is he?

Did they make it?

Was this all for nothing?

I swallow and stomp the pain down hard, letting the questions die in my throat.

It's better if I don't know.

Either way ...

He isn't here.

"… All I know is he showed up in the emergency room with what looked like a knife wound. He lost a lot of blood from the gash and went into cardiac arrest. The cut nicked his Brachial Artery and …"

And what? …

Dare I hope for a miracle …

Could he be telling me what I needed to hear …

Did I do it …

Is there a fucking God?

My head is spinning …

He's struggling with something …

"… Bella, did you know you were a rare blood type, O negative?"

"No ... what are you trying to tell me?"

That's not what I wanted to hear.

I just want him to get to the point.

Just then the doors open and Alice, Edward and ... Tanya all walk in.

The breath I was holding rushed out at the sight of him … alive … but now that I knew he was still breathing was it wrong that I want him to leave?

As much as I love seeing Edward, this reunion is just too painful and masochistic, even for me. But before I send them away I can't help myself. I was looking him over …

They look unharmed. Visibly upset, but not beat down. Then again it has been eight weeks.

Alice is the first to step up; she hugs me a beat longer then customary.

"Took your sweet time huh B? You know how my brother hates it when you keep him waiting ..." Alice jokes, but the slight tremor in her voice gives her away. "… We would have been here sooner, but Edward had to pick me up …"

He interrupts Alice's story, immediately replacing her at my bedside.

I saw the tortured emotion behind the haunted look in his eyes right before his lips touched mine for a kiss. It was chaste and lasted only a fleeting second, but it still left butterflies. They tingled with the contact, and it was obvious that my body hadn't forgotten; it shivered with the sensation his lips delivered.

My questioning eyes meet his apologetic ones before falling on Tanya, expecting some sort of reaction … but there isn't any.

She is looking directly at me like I owe her money or something.

I don't understand ...

I hate myself for wanting it.

For wanting him.

This weakness I have for him should have put me in the ground by now.

Her acceptance of Edward's kiss has me not wanting to dwell on it though.

If she can be okay then so can I … right?

Right?

… Fuck ...

… No … No, I can't let it go ...

Something is up …

"Mind telling what is going on?"

I look around the room, all eyes on me.

"You don't recognize me do you?" Tanya breaks the silence.

I look at her more closely.

I don't _want_ to know her.

I _want_ to hate her.

She's in the way.

She has something I want.

But there is something about her I find difficult to hate.

I feel drawn to her for reasons beyond me.

Maybe it's this drug induced coma I just came out of that has me all messed up.

Maybe it's the connection to Edward we share; some weird love thing?

Who knows?

I can't quite put my finger on it and it's making my head hurt to try.

"We were friends a very long time ago ..." She continues.

I don't have any friends …

I narrow my eyes and pierce the depth of her blue ones.

The face is older.

The rounded cheeks of a young girl I once remembered have been replaced with the high cheekbones of a grown woman.

"Kate?"

The room is spinning again but much faster, and I feel like I'm in the warehouse with Aro again.

I lean to one side as my body heaves.

I have nothing in my stomach, so it just convulses and continues to heave dry air.

It's not pretty.

All the thoughts of her and what this all means has me unhinged.

I couldn't control my physical reaction.

The girl who taught me to jump fences and shared her things without a second thought.

The first person who ever cared enough about me to make sure I wasn't hungry.

And the only person besides Edward who I'd ever truly mourned.

Tanya was Kate.

She's the other woman ...

Edward is holding a small trash can for me and rubbing my back.

But suddenly even his touch makes me recoil.

Did he know.

Did Alice …

Charlie?

All this time Edward was working with ... sleeping with ... Kate ...

Aro's daughter.

He's marrying her or married her already.

I don't even know if they got married.

I look past them, to Charlie.

The man I trusted with my life for over a decade.

The man who I looked up to.

I swallowed hard ...

Could I even trust him ...

His brows furrow at the visible, overwhelming panic on my face.

"There's more B ..." He tells me; his voice trying to be calming.

How can there possibly be more?

Kate and Edward both betrayed me?

I wish I had died right where Aro left me.

I should have died.

This is far more devastating on so many levels.

"Bella …" Edward starts but I don't want to hear him.

As sick as it may be, I don't want to taint my memories of him this way.

Is it too much to have the memory of what we had go untainted.

Don't I deserve at least that ...

Something good in my sorry excuse of a life.

"… you lost a lot of blood …

And because your blood type is rare there wasn't much to give you …

Until Aro showed up ..." His voice cracks.

What is he talking about?

Just when I begin to think I've figured it out, I'm thrown another curve.

"Aro has the same rare blood type," Edward continues.

"Kate chose not to resuscitate him, and then donated his blood to you."

Oh shit ... it's even worse than I thought.

"You're telling me I have Aro's damned blood pumping through my veins?"

"It saved your life, B." Edward says that like it's supposed to make me feel better about having that monster inside my body … even if he's keeping me alive … the irony of it doesn't escape me.

I have to admit ... Aro could not have planned it better himself if he tried.

Even in death, he still managed a way to haunt me.

I'd rather be choking on daisies and take my chances on the other side.

They had no right ...

"He was already a part of you Bella." Kate says.

I love her, loved her, but the anger I feel right now toward her is simmering ...

She better not bring up my history with Aro.

It should have been her he trained, not me.

It should have been her to lead this life, not me.

Edward was the only good thing to come out of my life, and now she has him too.

Maybe that's the way it was always supposed to be.

I refused to allow the tears, to fall pray once again, to the emotions that got me here in the first place.

I close my eyes and wish I could go back to the internal shouting again.

"Don't you see?

… Aro took you in and loved you like a daughter Bella, because …"

I'm processing as she's talking, and my stomach is rolling again with what I hope I'm not about to hear.

It can't be.

All these years and he never uttered a word.

I had been a tool for him to use, and it never bothered me before.

I accepted it.

Welcomed it even.

I had a roof over my head, clean clothes, and a full plate.

Phil or Renee never paid any attention to me except when I brought food and or drugs.

Aro paid a lot of attention, but ended up beating me unconscious and leaving me for dead.

Was this why he was relentless in his pursuit?

"… you are his daughter.

You're my half-sister Bella."

* * *

**A/N**

**(((Gasp!))) … Did you? **

**I did, but for an entirely different reason … 316 reviews! (((Hugs))) Thank You!**

**… I love stories with a twist. Most of you didn't see Kate coming, so I'm hoping that you enjoyed an element of surprise here too … **

**So B pulls through! Yay! Although, at this point she may be wishing otherwise. Poor B takes all kinds of emotional hits this chappy. Will she recover? Can she accept the new course her life has taken? And does E have a place in it?**

**We are winding down … Next Chapter is EPOV and our last regular chapter. Initially I hadn't planned on an Epilogue but … I have really enjoyed hearing from you through reviews, PMs, and Facebook that I thought I'd honor your dedication to the story by writing one. It will be BPOV … it's appropriate to hear from B one last time … it is her story after all. **

_I have also put together a small collection of Charlie's Outtakes. My beta, SunflowerFran, really enjoyed them so I'm thinking you will too. If you would like a copy they have been donated to Fandom for Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. _

_Here is a link with information on how to donate so you can get your copy of Charlie's Outtakes and many other donated pieces from some of our favorite authors. There is also a teaser up. _

_ *Okay, FF removed the link here ... I tried the but they are too smart for me so the link is in my profile or you can google __Fandom for Leukemia & Lymphoma Society_.  


**I have a new story in the works! … Drama/Crime/Suspense/Angst, think along the lines of Bourne Identity, Twilight style, lol! It appears I have a genre that speaks to me. I don't have all the kinks worked out yet but if you liked this fic you might like the next one too, just sayin'. Put me on Author Alert if you're interested. I'd like to get the majority of the story written before posting so it may be a week or two after this is complete before the other one starts. I will try to get a summary and teaser to post at the end of the Epi, no promises though.**

**Sorry for the long A/N and See you all next week!**


	16. Forgiveness & Redemption

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**

**Beta'd by SunflowerFran Thank you! **Mistakes are always my own****

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Chapter 16

Bella's not taking the news well.

The expressions that morph across her face are new to me.

She's usually so guarded with her emotions that it's difficult to tell how she's feeling unless she shows you.

I had no clue what to expect from her.

I haven't exactly been the most welcoming.

Fighting every instinct I had to be with her has alienated her from me.

Now though, it seems as if I could read her like a book, and I don't like what I'm finding.

She doesn't mask anything, and there is pain.

Deep

Tortured

Pain.

I want to make it go away.

I want to kick everyone out of the room and make the rest of the world disappear. To help ease the hurt she so obviously feels.

I want to crawl into bed with her and make her forget the last ten years.

It's been torture to come here every day and know that she's one IV bag away from waking up ...

So close and yet again, still so far away.

Her body is well on its way to making a full recovery, but her soul has just begun to uncover wounds that may never heal.

I've made a lot of changes and done a lot of soul searching over the past two months.

After some pretty heavy, heated arguments, and fighting early on, things with Kate have ended.

Well, they truly ended way before the words were ever spoken and honestly … I should have ended it sooner.

My heart has always belonged to Bella, and her reappearance only solidified those feelings. Fighting it was like swimming upstream after being starved for ten years. It was only a matter of time before my heart's betrayal corrupted every facet of my life until it got what it wanted.

None of this has been easy on Kate.

She has been spending her time behind bars but had been shown leniency for her cooperation. With her testimony, and the names she dropped, Aro's entire operation has been halted. It won't stop the small time traffickers, but the larger operation has been shut down.

She is out today to see Bella, it was her only request, and Charlie thought Bella deserved to know about her relationship to Aro, and she needed to hear it from Kate. Once she's done here, she will be taken back to lock-up to serve the remainder of her sentence. She refused Witness Protection, insisting to serve her time in Chicago so she could still be close to her mother.

I still harbor hard feeling over how she influenced the course of Bella's life and mine but at the same time I am eternally grateful for her help in the end.

It was Aro's blood that saved Bella's life.

The very person who stole her life had been the same person to ultimately give it back to her. Kate held that knowledge in her hands. She could have easily been spiteful and turned her back.

But she didn't.

I hope Bella can learn to accept it and embrace her second chance …

Hopefully, our second chance …

"How long have you known?" Bella asks Kate.

"I was thirteen when I overheard my mom fighting with my dad … our dad …"

"Aro," Bella sternly corrected her.

"… Sorry, Aro. They were fighting, and my mom wanted to know if he was still sleeping with your mom. Eventually, my mom brought you up and demanded he leave you and Renee alone, and he laughed, said you were his daughter and you weren't going anywhere. He told her he had plans for us, his girls. He said he had wanted boys, but what he got was even better. I didn't know what he was talking about until much later."

I'm sitting so close to Bella that I'm practically on top of her.

I can't get close enough.

I've laced our fingers, and she takes my hand without question.

Bella and Kate both have tears in their eyes.

Kate was struggling with her story, often getting choked up. She didn't get this emotional when she recounted the memories to me. I guess telling Bella brought out a different side of her.

"I didn't know what he had you doing Bella, I swear. My mom hated your mom and didn't want us to be friends. That's why we moved away. My dad still kept close tabs on me, but my mom wouldn't let him have the same control over me that he had over you. She said you were dangerous, and I shouldn't trust you."

Bella's grip tightened on my hand, and it was surprisingly strong given she hadn't used those muscles in almost two months.

"My parents both pushed me into law enforcement. Each had their own reasons and agendas. I just wanted them to be happy and stop fighting. When Aro was arrested my mother begged me to help him get out and ultimately help to fake his death. She did love him to some extent, but she was really more afraid of a life without him. There were some of Aro's men, paid utility workers on the inside while Da… Aro was in lock-up waiting for transport. They worked quick and smuggled him out. They are also the ones who set up his death. All they needed from me was to look the other way and cause a distraction. When Aro disappeared no one suspected me. No one knew my relation to him, it had always been a well-guarded secret. Aro told me you were responsible; that you set him up. And while I know that part is true, he had filled my head up with so much more, spewed all kinds of lies since you disappeared, similar to what my mother had been telling me all these years, to turn me against you and keep us apart. The only difference was that then, Aro needed me to help find you. That's how I met Edward..."

Bella was shaking; the story garnering such a strong emotional reaction out of her.

"That's enough … please … I don't want to know anymore." Her voice was raspy almost strangled.

I pulled her to me and held her, hopeful that she could still find some comfort in my arms.

It was the first time I've ever really seen her so choked up; her well-placed mask nowhere in sight.

She was sobbing; letting it all out.

"I'm so sorry Bella. I'm sorry for all the pain I caused you, that Aro caused you, and I'm so sorry ... I … I fell in love with Edward ... because ... he loves you ... he never stopped…"

I didn't ask her to say that.

I never coaxed or fed her lines. So to have her admit it truly surprised me. I don't know why she did, nor do I care; I'm just grateful she did. I knew there was part of me I always held back from Tanya; a part that had always belonged to Bella. I guess I didn't realize she knew.

I know I have a long way to go to deserve Bella back in my life again.

She's risked so much; given up more than anyone could give.

Her strength in the midst of adversity has been an inspiration, and I'm humbled by it.

There is so much lost time to make up for.

So much hurt to work through.

I know this won't get better overnight, but I'm not letting her go ever again.

Charlie said she was heading back to Paris where she had been this whole time, and if she's going, so am I.

Like hell if I'm letting some croissant eating Parisian steal her away …

No fucking way.

If she thought I was persistent the first time, she has no idea what's in store for her now.

I just got her back and I'll spend the rest of my life making this up to her.

Letting her know it wasn't all for nothing.

"It's true, I never stopped loving you B …" I whisper it in her ear, and she tightens her grip.

"… I'm so sorry, I didn't tell you sooner."

I could have sworn I heard her say the damn words again, but she's still sobbing into my shoulder so I can't be sure …

Could just be wishful thinking.

After everything that has happened I have no idea if she still wants me in her life.

I can only hope.

Kate is still talking, oblivious to the moment, "… I know I have a horrible way of showing it, but I love you too, like a sister, even before I knew you were my sister. And one day ... I hope you can maybe … forgive me..."

The room was quiet for a moment.

"… I don't expect you to. I know I don't deserve it …"

Bella slowly calming, pulls away from me, and I reluctantly let her go.

Alice was quick to curl up under my arm, tears streaming down her face.

Bella fully releases her hold on me and reaches out to Kate.

Kate looks at me, shocked by the invitation, but doesn't hesitate to step forward and put her arms around Bella.

They cry some more …

Apologies are exchanged …

Forgiveness given …

And I'd be damned if Charlie and I didn't get misty; letting a few tears loose watching the heartfelt moment.

Bella always said she didn't have family; didn't have anyone.

She never felt like she belonged anywhere, but she does.

She belongs here, with me … with us.

Bella pulled Alice and me into their hug and then called out to Charlie,

"Get over here C."

With our arms all tightly intertwined with one another, I think about the people in the circle.

The impact we have had on one another; the rolls we played in each other's lives.

The hurt …

The love …

The dreams built and broken.

The past will always link us, the present begin to heal us, and the future …

Well, that has still yet to be seen ...

But I hope we will see it … together.

After a beat, Bella chokes out an emotional, shaky, "… I love you ..."

It wasn't directed at anyone in particular, but we all heard it ...

Felt it.

In our own way.

* * *

**A/N**

**_"It's funny how someone can break your heart and you still love them with all the little pieces."_**

**I read that quote and thought it fit this fic, so I wanted to share.**

**In the end this was about Forgiveness … about Redemption. **

**We all do things that we are not proud of in our lifetime. How we choose to move forward from our mistakes speaks to our character, and further separates us from those who don't deserve our attention … **

**That was the last regular chapter, hopefully, you've found some closure and most, if not all, your questions have been answered. I know Kate being there caused some confusion and upset, but I hope that's been cleared up, and you see how and why she needed to be there. I hope the 'Forgiveness' doesn't seem too out of place. No one is perfect; no one is blameless. They all have faults. **

**We will still hear from B in the Epi so don't despair if there are still some things she needs to clear up like, her thoughts on Kate, and I don't know … maybe if there is a place for E in her life now that everything is out in the open… **

**What will happen to B now? Does she stay or does she go? Do they find their HEA together or maybe separately? Ever wonder what B was up to in Paris … hmmm, we may get a little glimpse in the Epi.**

Again … If you are needing more, you can get Charlie's Outtakes, from when he starts the case, up to finding B after her confrontation with Aro. Ever wonder what was going through his mind or what he thought of E and how he felt about B? Donate to Fandom for Leukemia & Lymphoma Society and find out!

Link is in my profile and here is a Small PART of the TEASER they have Posted:

_Where I Belong: Charlie's Outtakes_

_I've been keeping tabs on Aro Volturi for three years now, and I haven't been able to crack this case. His operation had been steadily growing, and had caught the attention of my department shortly before I was put on it. We've lost one undercover agent already; his body had to be identified with dental records. Delivering that news to his widow was not something I was looking to repeat. _

_I needed something else; someone else._

Want more? Go check it out … then donate! :)

**I can't even begin to express the warm fuzzy feeling I got as the reviews and all the Author Alerts began pouring in … Seriously … I have no words. Thank you for the support. I am amazed and humbled. I hope I don't let you down.**

**O.M.G. 358 Reviews! (((Squeee!))) **

**Thank you all so much, and my appoligies for the terribly loooooong A/N, but … **

**I have a surprise for you next update!**

**See you next week!**


	17. Epilogue - Bella

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**

**Beta'd by SunflowerFran Thank you! **Mistakes are always my own****

**Early Update! I needed a little Tuesday Pick-Me-Up ... maybe you do too, Enjoy!**

* * *

_EPILOGUE - Bella:_

The sun is shining, and the cool, crisp, spring air fills my lungs as I take my familiar path down past The Louvre. It's one of my favorite places in Paris, and I can't help but slow my stride just to be in its presence a little bit longer. It feels as though it's been years, but it's been less than one. I've missed it more than I'd like to admit. Being away, I've developed a new appreciation for this place. It feels more like home now than it ever did before.

I visited The Louvre a lot when I was having a particularly difficult day. It helped ... Looking at the sculptures and the art pieces, and thinking how long they've been around; I'm a mere speck in their timeline … The subjects and artist who were worse off than me, some living in deplorable conditions, in times where there were no options.

It puts my life in perspective.

Yes, I was born into some crappy circumstances, but it didn't have to define me.

I could have walked away sooner … I could have tried to, anyway.

I didn't; I made my bed.

I push the unwelcome thoughts away and take another sweeping look around as I pass the place I once took sanctuary.

My life isn't perfect, never has been, so I'm not even sure I'd know what that would look like.

I do know it's drastically different now.

My recovery was rough, but I pushed hard through my Physical Therapy to get the hell out and finally got the all clear to travel.

Things with Alice slipped right back into place; like no time had passed, and even the distance hasn't kept us from communicating in some form, daily … I'm not complaining, but it will take some getting used to.

Charlie left Chicago before I even got out of the hospital; his assignment was complete. Aro's operation was shut down, so C moved up; it's classified, and I don't know where he is or what he's doing now, but every now and then I get a postcard with no return address … I guess it's his way of keeping in touch. A part of me wishes I still had that lifeline to him. It's strange not to have a way to reach out to him, but maybe one day there'll be a return address.

Kate will never be in law enforcement again. She still has another twelve years to serve but will probably be out sooner. I have mixed feelings about her, but what it all boils down to is there was a reason things happened the way they did. Kate was far from innocent in her actions, but I'm not exactly guiltless either … Who am I to cast stones. And the way her life played out … she was a victim too.

We were two sides of the same coin; Aro's coin.

Will we ever be as close as sisters should be, probably not. But she does have my forgiveness, and that's something. The little girls we were over twenty years ago are long gone, but the bond we had still lingers; it's deeply rooted in a time of shared innocence when everything around us was anything but.

Footsteps fast approaching from behind still give me chills, and I realize the almost, automatic response to defend myself may always be with me. Looking over my shoulder to watch my back, and scanning a crowd for potential trouble is just too ingrained in me not to.

"Marie!"

I know that voice.

It's not an unwelcome one, quite the opposite, but I was really hoping that Paris was a big enough city that we wouldn't run into each other so soon. I slow to a stop, and greet him, smiling bigger than I think he's ever seen before. Even he looks different; this new appreciation for things in my life is a real eye-opener.

Emmett McCarthy, handsome as all hell, a friend who offered comfort without strings, knowing it was the only way I could function. He was born and raised in Paris, but his father is from California. So while he speaks fluent French, English is his second language. He runs too; it's how we met. I needed a new pair of running shoes, and we happened to be in the same store, got to talking, and ended up having a cup of coffee at a nearby cafe.

It wasn't easy to talk to him at first, and I never shared anything too personal while he shared his life story. I was at the peak of my loneliness, and he showed up with his easy going, lighthearted personality, and gave me what I needed … a distraction from the monotony, an ear to listen, on the off chance I had something to share, a shoulder to cry on, without question … a friend. Did he want more, undoubtedly, but I couldn't give him anything more than the physical release we both occasionally needed. But after … when he expected cuddles and intimacy, I gave him tears and silence. Eventually, we settled into a comfortable friendship and running partnership.

I just didn't have it in me to give him anything more, and he deserved better; we both did.

"Are you back, Cheri?" He says as we share our usual greeting, three kisses, one on each cheek then he always kisses my nose.

He did it once, and I laughed, so it stuck. He said I didn't laugh enough.

"Why didn't you call? I would have picked you up or at least ran with you today!"

"Emmett, I'm sorry; I've been a terrible friend … I've just, been going through some things."

He wears that wide grin well.

"Chéri, then you should have called; you know I'm here."

He drapes his arm around my shoulder like it's the most natural thing to do, except it's not. Aside from our initial greeting we didn't publicly display affection or maybe that was just me.

"Ahem"

Someone clears their throat, and Emmett's face gives nothing away. Very casually he responds, "Oui, je peux vous aider?" _(Yes, May I help You?)_

Edward hides it well, but he isn't happy, and this may turn out ugly … not exactly how I wanted them to meet.

"C'est lui n'est-ce pas?" _(This is Him isn't it?)_ He's talking to me but looking at Edward.

"Comment saviez-vous?" _(How did you know?)_

"Comment pourrais-je pas? Donnez-moi un petit chéri de crédit." _(How could I not? Give me a little credit darling.)_

I never mentioned Edward, nor did I ever tell him there was someone else, but I guess it didn't take rocket science to decode my tears and lack of intimacies.

"L'aimez-vous?" _(Do you love him?)_

I look at Edward; his brow is furrowed, and I know not understanding the language is making him uncomfortable, so I offer him an apologetic smile.

xxXXxx

During my hospital stay, Edward was there with me until someone kicked him out. But he was back first thing the next morning. He worked the third shift while I slept and took all his personal leave, vacation and sick days and any other days he could possibly take just so he could be around when I needed him, and even when I didn't. He'd been punishing himself far better than I could have. I let him; a part of me enjoyed watching him sweat it out. The cynical Isabella is never far away.

He made his intentions abundantly clear; the ball was in my court for a change, and my ball was heading to Paris.

He followed without question.

We needed a fresh start away from all of the drama being in Chicago caused. It was his turn to leave it all behind. He moved to a foreign country, away from his friends and family and everything he had ever known … without as much as a promise from me.

The first time I'd uttered the words 'I love you', at the hospital, it was like finally being able to take a deep breath after a hundred shallow ones.

I felt love for each one of them on different levels; it felt right to tell them after almost losing the opportunity altogether. I didn't want another missed moment to pass, and I hope they were all paying attention, because I haven't repeated it since. Not because I can't, although that still remains to be seen, but just saying it, to say it, doesn't feel right either.

Edward and I have no labels for what we are to each other, but I know, without a doubt, that I will never love another.

"Oui, beaucoup." _(Yes, very much.)_

There's a very pregnant pause as the weight of the moment settles in.

"Alors je suis content pour toi ma chérie." _(Then I'm happy for you darling.)_

"Be good to her," He says to Edward and turns to give me a single kiss on the nose.

"Vous savez comment me joindre." _(You know how to reach me.)_

I know this isn't goodbye.

I'll see him, and we will still go for runs and yet I'm sad.

I can feel our relationship shifting.

"Hey wait … thank you Emmett, for looking out for her. I'm glad she had a friend." That was difficult for Edward to admit. Emmett wasn't an easy topic between us.

Emmett nods acknowledging Edward then looks at me and says, "She still does … Jusqu'à la prochaine fois chérie." _(Until next time darling.)_

I can't explain the emotion that passed between us; it's nothing I've ever felt toward him before, but as I watch his retreating form I'm reminded of a time not that long ago when it was me who was taking that run.

"Are you all right?" Edward's arms wrap around my waist; his lips at my temple, as his hands lightly squeeze my hip.

"I will be." I tell him honestly, and I finally feel as if it truly would be all right. The exchange with Emmett had been the missing piece. Although my heart was a little heavier; I felt the weight lifting off my shoulders.

I've waited my entire life, hoping, but never expecting to ever get to this place, but standing here in the heart of Paris, wrapped in Edward's arms … makes me happy.

I did it …

I broke away from all the ugliness, death and destruction …

I have Edward … the only man who has ever possessed me … mind, body, and soul.

You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have …

There is a future beyond my past …

And I am here …

Where I Belong …

* * *

**A/N**

**Did you enjoyed hearing from B and the little glimpse into her life, past and present? She made it; she finally feels like she found a place to belong … She's happy, and that's all we really wanted for her in the end. **

**(((Sniff Sniff))) It's over. (((Bawling))) **

**But Wait, it's not over yet … I promised a surprise! **

**I didn't forget … BONUS Epi EPOV! Warning it's 20% Story & 80% Lemon so if that's not your thing the story ends here for you, but if you are like me, lol; I'll see you back here soon. It will be an early update in honor of the kid's birthdays and going back to school! **

**RL has been kicking my butt with the above mentioned birthdays and back to school so I haven't had much time to write. And the family and I will be leaving for two weeks the end of September to Guam. I will do my best to get the new story complete so I can start posting again but in the mean time don't forget about Charlie's outtakes. They will eventually be posted here, but it is a great cause, so if you can, make a donation. **

**Also, I recently posted my Angst entry O/S, If Only. Check it out if you haven't already.**

**Thank You!**


	18. Epilogue - Edward

**All the usual Disclaimers… I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement intended.**

**Beta'd by SunflowerFran Thank you! **Mistakes are always my own****

**Enjoy!**

* * *

_EPILOGUE - Edward:_

I place wet, open mouth kisses all along her neck down to her breast as I draw a nipple into my mouth.

My hands eagerly roam as her body reacts to my touch … her back is arching off the bed and her fingers are twisting further into the sheets.

I've spent the last several days in Paris pleasuring her, but my appetite is voracious.

It's never enough.

It will never be enough.

I have years to make up for.

After seeing her with Emmett earlier, the fierce urgency to erase his touch from her body has consumed me.

"Edward please … "

I reign myself in, wanting to draw it out and slowly kiss my way down to where she needs me.

Her breathing is labored and rough.

I disconnect my lips from her body to take a good look at her face as I push a finger inside her warmth, and then two.

My cock is painfully throbbing at the sight of her splayed out before me.

She's stunning …

Her face, contorted in pleasure …

The soft curve of her breast …

Her slender frame, healed, and stronger than ever …

The lean muscles of her long legs wrapped around me …

I never want this to end.

My tongue finds her sensitive flesh and she gasps.

I take long, gentle strokes, but it isn't long before she's demanding more.

She fists my hair with one hand silently pleading for more.

I'd never deny her anything.

I give her what she needs; my tongue knows exactly what she wants.

My fingers pumping faster.

Her moaning is more urgent, and her thighs are quivering.

"Edward I need you … "

I pull back and kiss her thighs, gliding my hands over the tense quiver, relaxing them.

She looks up at me as I hover over her body; her chest is heaving and there's a lazy smile playing on her lips.

I firmly stroke my cock once before slowly sliding the head up and down her wet slit.

Then in one very deliberate push …

I'm home.

I groan at the intense sensation.

Nothing between us.

Her heat engulfs me and I still my movement.

The pleasure is too much.

Her heels dig into me.

Her hand reaches up and cups my cheek, thumb gently touching my lips.

I kiss the pout forming there and begin to slowly rock into her.

I love her so much.

There isn't anything I wouldn't give to make this permanent.

I thrust harder; the way I know she likes it.

She's close, and I feel my own coil building.

I pull out and thrust harder, faster …

Her kiss is rushed, and she bites my lower lip right before she stops kissing altogether.

Her climax takes over, pulsing around my cock.

My head falls into her neck as I thrust even harder chasing my own release.

"Fuck … I love you so fucking much …" I utter as I come deep inside the woman who's owned me from the moment I first laid eyes on her.

"I love you too." She says breathlessly.

My heart stutters and stops.

She said it so easily.

No hesitation.

As if she says it, every day.

My full weight drops on her, and still connected I hold her to me with my entire body folding in on her.

She taps my shoulder … "Can't. Breathe."

"Shit, sorry."

I loosen my hold and prop up on my elbows still not wanting to disconnect from her.

"… It's just; I've waited to hear you say that to me for so long …

I didn't think …"

"… I've said it before, you were there."

"To _me_, Bella … just to me."

She captures my lips; kissing me deep before pulling away far too soon.

"I'm sorry, when I said 'you were there' … what I meant to say was … I love you Edward Cullen. I've loved you far longer than I'll ever admit … it has always been you."

Her declaration was exactly what I needed.

I dip down and seal those words with a kiss, attempting to show her how precious a gift they are to me … My thoughts go straight to the little box I have hidden in my nightstand. Alice is going to kill me for messing with the plan. I was supposed to do the whole date thing and take her some place romantic, but this …

Right now …

In this moment …

The feeling I was waiting for …

Hoping for …

For over ten years …

Fuck the plan.

I get up and Bella grumbles at the move.

I chuckle because now I'm excited and nervous and a little panicked.

I reach over and pull open the drawer shuffling things around until I find it.

"What are you doing?

It's a little late to look for a condom Edward."

Silly woman … she has no idea.

I open the box and tuck the ring in my palm hidden from her curious eyes.

"I'm never putting a condom on again." I tell her as I crawl back on top of her.

"Then you better be prepared for the consequences …" She teases, unknowingly giving me the perfect opportunity.

"I'm prepared … I want it; I want it all."

Her smile falters slightly at my serious tone.

"I've wanted this … waited for this … prayed for this moment.

I want you … forever Bella."

I show her the ring and her quick intake of breath lets me know it's going to be all right.

She's stunned silent; tears pooling and filling her eyes.

"I've waited twelve years to give you this ring." I meet her surprised gaze.

"Isabella … Bella … I love you, and nothing could feel more right than having you in my life.

Will you marry me?"

She's nodding her head, and with her voice laced with emotion she whispers, "Yes."

I slip the ring on her finger, and seeing it there for the first time does something to me.

I kiss her fiercely.

Passion raging through our lips.

It wasn't how I planned to ask her, but it was perfect nonetheless.

I was ready to start a life with her, and now it's beginning to feel more like home.

The End.

… or maybe it's just the beginning.

* * *

**A/N**

**(((Sniff Sniff))) Now, it's over. (((Bawling))) **

**Okay, enough of that, lol.**

**Sequel anyone? … I don't know when I would get to it, but wanted to see if there is even any interest … so, yay more badass B or, nay let her enjoy her peace? **

**I'm still working on the New Story, Exposing Identities (Awesome banner by DeeBelle Onefic on my Facebook page. She also did a beautiful one for If Only.) **

**I've said my thanks all along the way, so I won't bore you with my blubbering. Just know that I appreciate the support. Thanks for taking a chance, and coming along with me for the ride. I could not have envisioned a better way to enter fandom, as a writer, than this. If you've enjoyed this, share it; I'd love to get some new readers! **

**And SunflowerFran, without you this would be nothing more than a few dusty chapters on my computer that no one would want to read. **

**Thank You!**  
**xoxo **


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